The Killer Rug of Despair

[Fire_on_High]

Hiking a leg high enough to wash like cats do would DEFINITELY do me in after a fall.

[Setsunaela]

i usually opt for the death glare at carpet stain i tripped over, one of those stares that indicates this stain/crumb/shadow i tripped on is lucky i continue to allow it to exist.

[ExRetailDrone]

I'm a klutz, too, and have literally tripped over a seam on a linoleum floor But do I threaten to sue the store the floor happens to have been laid in? No, I look around sheepishly and then scurry off to hide

I have also been known to trip while going up stairs. That's always fun. I've begun to care less and less as I've gotten older, and am much better at laughing at my clumsiness now, but when I did that in high school it was mortifying if anyone saw me

[hotelslave]

I am a clumsy person. Trip over air bumps all the time have yet to think I should sue a store because of my clumsiness.

[XCashier]

Am I the only one that if I trip or fall... I get up red faced and look around to see if anyone seen me and then I run away

Nope, I'm another member of the Klutz Corps. Honestly, I'm surprised I've lived as long as I have with the amount of falls and near-misses I've had.

[JustaCashier]

'nother member of the Klutz Club here!

I have also been known to trip while going up stairs.

One time at the Hardware Store, we were having one of our big sales, and had courtesy coffee at the Paint Desk.

It was dispensed from one of those basic coffee urns, but we didn't have the guts for it, to brew it in the urn. So, we'd start by running several drip pots form the standard household drip machine upstairs in the breakroom, then dump more pots in as needed throughout the day, bring the coffee down in the drip machine's glass carafe.

I did one such refill, and headed back upstairs with the empty glass carafe. There was a long staircase up, then hang a left, and about three stairs more to enter the breakroom.

I tripped on the short staircase, and started to go down. The only thing going through my mind was picturing the glass carafe smashing on the floor and shattering, and then me falling heavily face first into it and becoming severely lacerated.

I kept going forward, in probably sort of a hunched over, partially squatting position, and fortunately thought rather quickly, and tried to steer myself toward the breakroom table, just a couple feet or so from the top of the stairs, at about a ten, or eleven o'clock position from them.

So, here I am, in this odd position, kind of stomping, and I slam the carafe down on the table. I can't remember if I was able to totally regain my balance, but maybe went down on one or both knees.

There was at least one other employee up there, sitting not far form where I safelt landed the carafe, and he was like

I'm still surprised that the thing didn't break as I slammed it on the table!

Mike

[BethB]

No, no, no. Watch how cats do it: Trip. Catch self. Check to see if anyone noticed. Act like you meant to do that all along.

That, or glare menacingly at the offending carpet stain (yes, I've tripped on one of those, too) as if daring it to try that the next time you walk through, then turn around and huff off so the carpet knows this is its lucky day as you won't take it outside right then and there for a good beatin'.

Yeah i've done both of these and so have my cats. Most times if there are witnesses i blame it on an unnatural shifts in the earth's gravitational pull.

[Sapphire Silk]

I'm so clumsy, I make other clumsy people look like they have unnatural grace.

EE's Evil Overlord is always commenting on the various bruises and joking about, "Is your boyfriend beating you again?" (NB: I'm not seeing anyone, so there is no boyfriend).

I either just cuss myself, or laugh at myself. There really isn't much more I can do.

[blas]

I wouldn't call myself a klutz, I am just a horrible judge of space.

I run into things at work constantly. I hop in the shower at night and see new bruises all over my legs from me taking corners too quickly or being hurried so much that I didn't realize there was something there.

[Argabarga]

I remember once, a long time ago, that I slipped in the kitchen of the restaurant I worked at, while carrying a whole tray of glasses, fresh out of the dishwasher.

As I was going down, I somehow managed to pivot my upper body 90 degrees, put the tray on the stainless steel end of the sink counter I was collapsing next to, and then fall the rest of the way to the floor, unharmed, but also unencumbered.

Manager saw the whole thing, said it was the most acrobatic fall he'd ever seen, and thanked me for not breaking anything

[Jangles the Moon Monkey]

I asked a co-worker if they were OK after they tripped once. They replied that they'd had a nice trip and they'd see me next fall. I was amused by that response!

[Shalom]

Went out to the supermarket last night because we were running out of diapers. I had to park a few houses down because there's still loads of snow from the last two storms blocking some of the spots (couldn't have parked there either, were it not for my 4x4) and was unloading the stuff from the car. My wife asks me if that was it, and I said no, I had to make one more trip.

As I was walking out to the car, I walked over a patch of wet black ice. My feet went left and I fell on my right elbow, fortunately into a pile of fairly soft snow so I didn't break anything, but jammed my shoulder pretty good.

As I was laying there in the snow, I said to myself, "F***, I knew I shouldn't have used that word."

[Nayeli_Sabia]

My most Epic Fall:

We where at a National Park, and it had been wet. We were going to the visitor center to buy a book and get it signed by the authors. I opened the first set of double doors, and as I move to the next set, my leather soled moccasins slip on the damp floor. I fall, hard and SPECTACULARLY. Not too badly hurt, i get up and look at the two authors, who just witnessed me wipe-out directly in front of them. We all burst out laughing. The name of the book? "Over the Edge: Death in Grand Canyon"

They both left notes about the fall when they signed the book ^_^




To the OP: I wonder if he was trying to pull of a personal injury scam?

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

The following is brought to you by the guy who ran into a tree. Not on a bike or a skateboard, mind you. He ran. Into the tree. Explains a lot doesn't it? He got a severely bruised knee, a fractured thumb and a concussion from that one.

Oh yeah, and then there was the time I was eating a caramel apple at some festival and walked right into a tent pole. But I escaped from that with no injuries.

[blas]

Natural blonde, Irv? Doc didn't think you'd need a helmet?