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Hey everyone. Sorry I haven’t posted in a while, I don’t have internet at my apartment, & I’ve been really busy for the past few weeks…
Had a customer this week that reminded me of one from last month though, so I figured I’d put them as one post of suckiness.
Recent Customer = Some Suckage
Background: Remember that I’m a manager at a hobby shop. We sell miniatures, dice and RPG books for many popular role-playing games, Dungeons & Dragons being most popular/most played out of any of them. Now, I’ve only played 3.0, 3.5, 4th Edition and Pathfinder (jokingly called 3.75) lately, but I think that gives me a nice amount of info to go on usually. At least it encompasses the last 10+ years of D&D, which is more than SOME people have played. However, it is apparently not good enough for some people…
Me/S: yours truly
SC: guess who
CW: much older male coworker
(I’m at the back register, which overlooks the gaming area. I see an older male customer looking through some of our D&D modules/books with a very confused look on his face.)
Me: Hi there. Anything I can help you with today?
SC: Ummm, I don’t think so. My 12 yr. old son and his friends want to get into 4th series D&D, but I have no clue about role-playing games like this…they’re like a foreign language to me.
Me: (laugh) Well, it can seem that way at first, but I assure you, your son will be picking it up in no time. Now, will he be the DM, or is someone else?
SC: (somewhat clueless look) Uh, I think the dad of one of his friends is doing…that.
Me: Oh, that makes it even simpler then! I would recommend getting him the Player’s Handbook I, and a poly set of dice. Once he figures out what race and class he wants to be, he can come back and find a miniature to represent his character. I can help him make his character if you bring him in too, and I’ll teach him what all the dice are for. (I tell him a little more about the game in detail, about 10 minutes worth.)
SC: Okay…how do YOU know about this stuff?
Me: Well, we run a game every Friday night after the store closes for some coworkers, myself, and former employees. Right now, I’m playing an Elven Sorceress in 1 game, a Halfling Barbarian in another, and we just finished a campaign about a month ago where I was a Tiefling Rogue. It’s really great fun, and is great for just about any age group. It really brings people together more than a videogame!
SC: Oh, I see…well, thanks then.
(He goes back to looking through books, and I return to the back register. A few minutes later, he walks up to the front register with some books and dice. He begins talking to CW, and I overhear this; )
SC: So, uh, these are for D&D right? Do you have any tips about getting started I can tell my son?
CW: Yeah, they are…I thought you were talking to S about those already. Are these the books she recommended?
SC: ….Yes, but y’know, you’re more my age, so I figured you’d know more about it.
CW: (chuckles) Well, if you asked me a few years ago, maybe. The last time I played was in 2nd Edition. The rules I grew up with are practically ancient by now, whereas S plays every week.
SC: Wait, she really DOES? I thought she was making stuff up to sell me things! My son said girls NEVER play this, it’s practically a rule!
CW: (long pause) You do know that it can’t really be a rule that a certain gender can’t play, right? I mean, more than ½ our staff is women, and it would be ridiculous if they couldn’t play the product they sell.
SC: I guess so. I just thought that, y’know, being a young girl and all she’d be into makeup and shoes and crap, not games…Sorry. (Leaves)
CW: (Leans around counter) So, when are you gonna get those shoes and crap?
Me: Shut up, CW. Don’t make me roll initiative on your ass.
Previous Customer = More Blatant Suckage
It’s morning, I’m at the front register, relatively quiet & I have 1 CW with me. Nice morning until…THIS.
(Phone rings)
Me: Good morning, this is *store name*.
SC: Yeah, hi, I have a broken system. I need to talk to the guy who fixes them.
Me: Okay, well today is his day off, but I can certainly answer most questions about this. What do you need to know?
SC: *dramatic sigh* Well, darlin’ it’s a Playstation and it’s not reading discs. I don’t think you can help me.
Me: Alright, which type of Playstation? If it is the Playstation 1 or 2, it may not be worth repairing since the separate parts tend to be more expensive than the whole system at this point.
SC: I…what? No, girl, it’s a Playstation 3! C’mon, no one cares about the other Playstations anymore! Geez…
Me: Actually, our store still sells PS1s and PS2s, but I can understand wanting the newest models from a company. Let me just make sure it doesn’t have the 1 problem we can’t fix…when you turn the system on does the light go from green to yellow to red? The yellow only appears for a second, but if you see that it means a “Yellow Light of Death” which is typically a motherboard problem, which we can’t repair.
SC: What? No! My PS3 doesn’t have any lights on it!
Me: So…it doesn’t power up at all, is what you’re saying?
SC: No, it DOES! But it won’t play my games or movies! Aren’t you listening?!
Me: (deep breath) Yes, sir, but then there should be a green light while the system is on, and a red when it’s on stand-by. If there isn’t, then your console may be switched completely off or unplugged.
SC: Well, DUH! Of course it’s unplugged, you think I have money to waste leaving it on all the time?!
Me: No, sir, I doubt anyone has money to waste right now. Tell you what; I’m here till 6 today. Why don’t you bring down your system when you can, and I’ll check for the yellow light? That way you won’t have to pay a diagnostic fee for something we can’t fix.
SC: A what? For god’s sake… CLICK.*Dial tone.*
Me: (Hang up phone, ring out 2 people.)
*5 minutes later, phone rings*
Me: *Good morning, *store name*!
SC: Uh, yeah, I called before and the chick hung up on me…I just need to talk to your tech.
Me: Well, sir, I can appreciate you may have phone trouble, but I did not hang up on you. Like I mentioned before, our tech is off today. Now, as I was saying, we have a $20 diagnostic fee, and about a 1-2 week turnaround on repairs. However, I wouldn’t want to take the fee if it’s something we can’t fix…
SC: Yeah, yeah, I heard you the first time. What the hell is a ‘digostic fee’ ?
Me: That’s a diagnostic fee, sir, not digostic. It’s a fee that we charge to clean the system, see what parts it needs, and run tests on it. In other words, diagnose the problem.
SC: What?! That’s ridiculous! Why the hell would you charge money for something like that?! That’s unbusiness-like, especially nowadays!
Me: Umm, not really sir. I just had my engine repaired on my car, and I paid a $30 diagnostic fee. It’s really not unheard of, and if a system is unfixable, it means our tech gets paid for his efforts to at least attempt to fix it, rather than wasting all his time on unrepairable machines.
SC: (Mumbles something about this being a waste of HIS time) CLICK. *Dial tone.*
Me: Hello? …jerk. (Hang up phone.)
*5-10 minutes later, phone rings*
Me: Good morning, *store name*!
SC: Goddammit! CLICK.
Me: Okay…
(Other line starts to ring, so I transfer to that one)
Me: Good morn-
SC: Oh for crying out loud! Why are YOU answering all my calls?! I’m trying to get a MAN to talk to me!
Me: Excuse me?
SC: For god’s sake, girlie, just let me talk to your tech! I know he’s there!
Me: Actually, no he is NOT. As I said before this is his DAY OFF. He will not be in AT ALL today, thus the meaning of a day off. Now, I do have 1 coworker with me today, and he is a ‘man’, but he is 4 years younger than me, doesn’t do repairs on systems other than cartridge-based, and has been working here for less than 2 years. I, on the other hand, have been here for 5+ years, and am a manager who doesn’t appreciate being called ‘girlie’ OR ‘darling’ by people I don’t know, AND could have helped you with this issue nearly half an HOUR ago if you didn’t keep hanging up on me!
SC: Well, I don’t see how, you have terrible customer service! If a customer wants to talk to a MAN about a MAN’S technical problem, he should be able to! You women types don’t know anything about electronics, any more than you know about cars! If MY wife talked to me like this, I’d never have married her! So you just lost a sale, MISSY! CLICK. *Dial tone.*
Me: Two can play this game. (I dial *69 to get his phone number.)
The next day, our tech actually IS in. I hand him a copy of this phone number, and tell him to let me know if we get a system attatched to this number. 3 days later a PS3 arrives with this as the contact number, and he lets me know when it’s done, but before he has called the guy.
Tech: So what was the problem with this guy?
Me: *Relay story of SC* I was thinking there should be a “Jerk Tax” applied to this special case.
Tech: Oh…well, his repair WAS going to be $80 + tax, but I think $100 + tax sounds a bit better for him. I’ll let him know.
Moral of Story: Don’t be rude to the people who are about to fix your already overly-priced toy. It WILL come back to bite you.
Had a customer this week that reminded me of one from last month though, so I figured I’d put them as one post of suckiness.
Recent Customer = Some Suckage
Background: Remember that I’m a manager at a hobby shop. We sell miniatures, dice and RPG books for many popular role-playing games, Dungeons & Dragons being most popular/most played out of any of them. Now, I’ve only played 3.0, 3.5, 4th Edition and Pathfinder (jokingly called 3.75) lately, but I think that gives me a nice amount of info to go on usually. At least it encompasses the last 10+ years of D&D, which is more than SOME people have played. However, it is apparently not good enough for some people…
Me/S: yours truly
SC: guess who
CW: much older male coworker
(I’m at the back register, which overlooks the gaming area. I see an older male customer looking through some of our D&D modules/books with a very confused look on his face.)
Me: Hi there. Anything I can help you with today?
SC: Ummm, I don’t think so. My 12 yr. old son and his friends want to get into 4th series D&D, but I have no clue about role-playing games like this…they’re like a foreign language to me.
Me: (laugh) Well, it can seem that way at first, but I assure you, your son will be picking it up in no time. Now, will he be the DM, or is someone else?
SC: (somewhat clueless look) Uh, I think the dad of one of his friends is doing…that.
Me: Oh, that makes it even simpler then! I would recommend getting him the Player’s Handbook I, and a poly set of dice. Once he figures out what race and class he wants to be, he can come back and find a miniature to represent his character. I can help him make his character if you bring him in too, and I’ll teach him what all the dice are for. (I tell him a little more about the game in detail, about 10 minutes worth.)
SC: Okay…how do YOU know about this stuff?
Me: Well, we run a game every Friday night after the store closes for some coworkers, myself, and former employees. Right now, I’m playing an Elven Sorceress in 1 game, a Halfling Barbarian in another, and we just finished a campaign about a month ago where I was a Tiefling Rogue. It’s really great fun, and is great for just about any age group. It really brings people together more than a videogame!
SC: Oh, I see…well, thanks then.
(He goes back to looking through books, and I return to the back register. A few minutes later, he walks up to the front register with some books and dice. He begins talking to CW, and I overhear this; )
SC: So, uh, these are for D&D right? Do you have any tips about getting started I can tell my son?
CW: Yeah, they are…I thought you were talking to S about those already. Are these the books she recommended?
SC: ….Yes, but y’know, you’re more my age, so I figured you’d know more about it.
CW: (chuckles) Well, if you asked me a few years ago, maybe. The last time I played was in 2nd Edition. The rules I grew up with are practically ancient by now, whereas S plays every week.
SC: Wait, she really DOES? I thought she was making stuff up to sell me things! My son said girls NEVER play this, it’s practically a rule!
CW: (long pause) You do know that it can’t really be a rule that a certain gender can’t play, right? I mean, more than ½ our staff is women, and it would be ridiculous if they couldn’t play the product they sell.
SC: I guess so. I just thought that, y’know, being a young girl and all she’d be into makeup and shoes and crap, not games…Sorry. (Leaves)
CW: (Leans around counter) So, when are you gonna get those shoes and crap?
Me: Shut up, CW. Don’t make me roll initiative on your ass.
Previous Customer = More Blatant Suckage
It’s morning, I’m at the front register, relatively quiet & I have 1 CW with me. Nice morning until…THIS.
(Phone rings)
Me: Good morning, this is *store name*.
SC: Yeah, hi, I have a broken system. I need to talk to the guy who fixes them.
Me: Okay, well today is his day off, but I can certainly answer most questions about this. What do you need to know?
SC: *dramatic sigh* Well, darlin’ it’s a Playstation and it’s not reading discs. I don’t think you can help me.
Me: Alright, which type of Playstation? If it is the Playstation 1 or 2, it may not be worth repairing since the separate parts tend to be more expensive than the whole system at this point.
SC: I…what? No, girl, it’s a Playstation 3! C’mon, no one cares about the other Playstations anymore! Geez…
Me: Actually, our store still sells PS1s and PS2s, but I can understand wanting the newest models from a company. Let me just make sure it doesn’t have the 1 problem we can’t fix…when you turn the system on does the light go from green to yellow to red? The yellow only appears for a second, but if you see that it means a “Yellow Light of Death” which is typically a motherboard problem, which we can’t repair.
SC: What? No! My PS3 doesn’t have any lights on it!
Me: So…it doesn’t power up at all, is what you’re saying?
SC: No, it DOES! But it won’t play my games or movies! Aren’t you listening?!
Me: (deep breath) Yes, sir, but then there should be a green light while the system is on, and a red when it’s on stand-by. If there isn’t, then your console may be switched completely off or unplugged.
SC: Well, DUH! Of course it’s unplugged, you think I have money to waste leaving it on all the time?!
Me: No, sir, I doubt anyone has money to waste right now. Tell you what; I’m here till 6 today. Why don’t you bring down your system when you can, and I’ll check for the yellow light? That way you won’t have to pay a diagnostic fee for something we can’t fix.
SC: A what? For god’s sake… CLICK.*Dial tone.*
Me: (Hang up phone, ring out 2 people.)
*5 minutes later, phone rings*
Me: *Good morning, *store name*!
SC: Uh, yeah, I called before and the chick hung up on me…I just need to talk to your tech.
Me: Well, sir, I can appreciate you may have phone trouble, but I did not hang up on you. Like I mentioned before, our tech is off today. Now, as I was saying, we have a $20 diagnostic fee, and about a 1-2 week turnaround on repairs. However, I wouldn’t want to take the fee if it’s something we can’t fix…
SC: Yeah, yeah, I heard you the first time. What the hell is a ‘digostic fee’ ?
Me: That’s a diagnostic fee, sir, not digostic. It’s a fee that we charge to clean the system, see what parts it needs, and run tests on it. In other words, diagnose the problem.
SC: What?! That’s ridiculous! Why the hell would you charge money for something like that?! That’s unbusiness-like, especially nowadays!
Me: Umm, not really sir. I just had my engine repaired on my car, and I paid a $30 diagnostic fee. It’s really not unheard of, and if a system is unfixable, it means our tech gets paid for his efforts to at least attempt to fix it, rather than wasting all his time on unrepairable machines.
SC: (Mumbles something about this being a waste of HIS time) CLICK. *Dial tone.*
Me: Hello? …jerk. (Hang up phone.)
*5-10 minutes later, phone rings*
Me: Good morning, *store name*!
SC: Goddammit! CLICK.
Me: Okay…
(Other line starts to ring, so I transfer to that one)
Me: Good morn-
SC: Oh for crying out loud! Why are YOU answering all my calls?! I’m trying to get a MAN to talk to me!
Me: Excuse me?
SC: For god’s sake, girlie, just let me talk to your tech! I know he’s there!
Me: Actually, no he is NOT. As I said before this is his DAY OFF. He will not be in AT ALL today, thus the meaning of a day off. Now, I do have 1 coworker with me today, and he is a ‘man’, but he is 4 years younger than me, doesn’t do repairs on systems other than cartridge-based, and has been working here for less than 2 years. I, on the other hand, have been here for 5+ years, and am a manager who doesn’t appreciate being called ‘girlie’ OR ‘darling’ by people I don’t know, AND could have helped you with this issue nearly half an HOUR ago if you didn’t keep hanging up on me!
SC: Well, I don’t see how, you have terrible customer service! If a customer wants to talk to a MAN about a MAN’S technical problem, he should be able to! You women types don’t know anything about electronics, any more than you know about cars! If MY wife talked to me like this, I’d never have married her! So you just lost a sale, MISSY! CLICK. *Dial tone.*
Me: Two can play this game. (I dial *69 to get his phone number.)
The next day, our tech actually IS in. I hand him a copy of this phone number, and tell him to let me know if we get a system attatched to this number. 3 days later a PS3 arrives with this as the contact number, and he lets me know when it’s done, but before he has called the guy.
Tech: So what was the problem with this guy?
Me: *Relay story of SC* I was thinking there should be a “Jerk Tax” applied to this special case.
Tech: Oh…well, his repair WAS going to be $80 + tax, but I think $100 + tax sounds a bit better for him. I’ll let him know.
Moral of Story: Don’t be rude to the people who are about to fix your already overly-priced toy. It WILL come back to bite you.
misogynist!
I love how you handled these..might have to become a fan. It's odd..when I go to someplace for repairs for anything, I tend to think the people I go to know what they are doing. Maybe I am just odd that way. I don't care if they are a purple and green zebra with pink spots..if they work at the place I go to, since I obviously don't know how to fix whatever I am wanting to have repaired..I am of the opinion they will know more then myself. 
I'm a girl, but I like video games, horror flicks and other "boy" stuff and people sometimes give me weird look and/or rude comments about me being "unladylike" (even if I do like shoes and crap too lol)
There's quite a few of us lady geeks on here; I've been a sci-fi nut since childhood, and into SCA and other geeky pastimes. Have never done role-playing or LARPing, but would love to try them out sometime.
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