Wherein I Admit I'm a Creepy Cashier

[Mr Hero]

I assume by dip you mean the tobacco product and not the delicious-on-chips stuff?

Nope, it's referring to the only way you can kill a cartoon.

[Lots42]

Many employees will try to give 'you' one. Many are forced to.

[parresa]

Me: Do you have XXX Rewards Card?
Customer: No thank you.
Me: *thinking* I wasn't offering you one...

[Cerys]

Look on the bright side - at least they said 'thank you'.

[redleg]

Let's Play a Game...

What can I tell about you just from your wallet and your keys lying out on the counter?

1. Your boyfriend's name is Luke.
2. You're not married to Luke yet, nor are you engaged.
3. You drive a Honda Civic.
4. You're a Phillies and Steelers fan.
5. You're most likely a nurse from the local hospital.
6. You like to read, eat mexican food, and you're a little bit of a push-over.
7. You have no kids but you're probably the best aunt in the world.
8. Your sister has either had kids with a man of another race or has adopted her kids. She has two, a boy and a girl. They're pretty cute.
9. You drink plenty of beer. That or your keychain bottle open was shoddily made.
10. You're from Alaska originally but now you live here.
11. You're 32.
12. Your birthday is in March. The 6th to be exact.
13. You live in an apartment.
14. You have a cat named Tiger.
15. You're not knit-picky about style or fashion, you just like bright colors and comfort.

I'm creepy.

hey im not the only one that does the Sherlock Holmes thing.

[Seshat]

Let's Play a Game...

What can I tell about you just from your wallet and your keys lying out on the counter?

1. Your boyfriend's name is Luke.
2. You're not married to Luke yet, nor are you engaged.
3. You drive a Honda Civic.
4. You're a Phillies and Steelers fan.
5. You're most likely a nurse from the local hospital.
6. You like to read, eat mexican food, and you're a little bit of a push-over.
7. You have no kids but you're probably the best aunt in the world.
8. Your sister has either had kids with a man of another race or has adopted her kids. She has two, a boy and a girl. They're pretty cute.
9. You drink plenty of beer. That or your keychain bottle open was shoddily made.
10. You're from Alaska originally but now you live here.
11. You're 32.
12. Your birthday is in March. The 6th to be exact.
13. You live in an apartment.
14. You have a cat named Tiger.
15. You're not knit-picky about style or fashion, you just like bright colors and comfort.

I'm creepy.

Working backwards:

1 & 2: has a 'Luke' half-heart or other sappy love thing on wallet or keychain.
3: Honda Civic key
4: Promo items attached to keychain, and/or loyalty cards visible in wallet
5: Local hospital keycard
6: More promo items attached to keychain, and/or loyalty cards in wallet
7 & 8: family photos in wallet (or on keychain, probably in wallet)
9: Gaki gives this one away. Keychain bottle opener.
10: Probably an 'Alaska' item on the keychain, local state driver's licence. OR their usual bank is one that's most commonly used by Alaskans.
11 & 12: maybe driver's licence, maybe a 'birthstone' keychain doodad
13: apartment-block-entry type key, as well as individual apartment key
14: cat head or fish key doodad with Tiger's name on it.
15: See above.


Now for mine, Gaki:

Keychain:
1 key for my home
Mobility scooter key (yes, I'm giving that away)
Gumleaf keychain doodad worked in iron
Mini LED torch.

Wallet:
Clutch-type wallet, the sort I could take out of my bag and use as a purse.
The side I'd open for a monetary exchange has two sections for cards.
Of the two, the side that's visible to a casual glance shows just the tops of each card.
Visible would probably be the state my driver's licence is from, which bank I bank with, the fact that I have a Medicare card (like every other Australian over 18), the fact that I have a health care card (which marks me as disabled, or under the local poverty line, or both)... hm. Oh yes. My organ donor card, and the business card of my family doctor.

[parresa]

Look on the bright side - at least they said 'thank you'.

Hahaha very true!

[Dreamstalker]

Customer called in a complaint for our store claiming that they had bought a frozen salad. This is impossible. Why? Because the salads at no time go anywhere where being frozen is a possibility. None. Nadda. Zip. Even the operations supervisor was like..."What? That's not even..."

Possible explanation for "frozen salad": Sometimes the stuff touching the back wall of a wonky refrigerator can freeze, and I have seen some prewashed bagged salads do this (condensation or moisture left in the bag, especially if it's been opened already). We never try to take it out on the store though (dad's usually like: "well, I guess we have to let the salad thaw again; turn the heat down on that chili so it can go another 10 minutes.").

Don't Worry About It

Me: Do you have a [company] rewards card?
SC: No, but don't worry about it.
Me: ...I'm not.
SC: ...uh. Well good.

Do I look worried? This just irks me. They really do say it like I'm just so concerned about it

I get that in various forms. Still don't know why...it's just one of those odd spoken bits that confuses the hell out of me.
"Do you have $obscurebook?"
"No, sorry. I've been looking for a copy myself."
"Don't worry about it. Seriously, don't." (gee, I'm just trying to be helpful by looking it up for you)

"Do you know $programminglanguage?"
"Not yet."
"That's OK, don't worry about it."

[vikingchyk]

What my keys usually tell people is that I have discount cards from most of the major supermarkets down here, I have a bicycle, and HOLY HELL MOTHER OF MOSES, YOU HAVE A LOT OF FUCKING KEYS.

you need keys to do that?

[Cerys]

Well, if she's wearing a chastity belt....

[Nayeli_Sabia]

My keys say I have a home, a mailbox, and a car ^_^. When I re-add my keychain, it will have a red-fake leather sleeve. (In that sleeve is a picture of my husband, but you have to swing the fake leather to the side to see it.)


I hate massive keys and keychains.

Oh, and chances are you won't see my wallet, since we use an envelope system ^_^

[Mr Hero]

Well, if she's wearing a chastity belt....

Call the locksmith!

[Kisa]

Really, it doesn't bother me. If you just say "no" I WON'T TRY TO GIVE YOU ONE.

That you for this lol Once I went to CVS at 1am to get a 5 hour for a coworker of mine. He has a 5 month old son and he workd night shifts so he needed it. When I went to pay for it the convorsation went a like this:

Cashier: Is that it?
Me: Yepp
Cashier: Do you have a CVS rewards card.
Me: No I don't have one.
Cashier: Oh well you need one then *grabs forms and papers and pens and cards and whatnot and dumps them all in front of me*
Me: Ummm....
Cashier: Just sign here and fill this out and
Me: Mam. I really don't need a CVS card...
Cahier: *gives me the "yeah right" look*
Me: I only come here like once a year.
Cashier: Oh come on! You only buy 5 hour energy once a year!!
Me: Actually, I don't drink it ever. This is for my friend at work. He asked me to get it for him.
Cashier: So you're just not gonna get it then?!
Me: Nope. Sorry.
Cashier: *huffily slams all the paperwork to the side and sulks through the transaction without a word*

[underemployeed]

Yeah, we get in trouble over rates.... although, because I can't be promoted and am looking for greener pastors, I can safely not care if I get written up because I will just bring everyone down with me. Girl keeping $1000 extra in her drawer when your not supposed to keep more than $100. Smokers who go to a location that is "outside" but actually in the building and they don't open the garage doors. etc etc.

I love how people get snappy when I say they can't borrow my card but i give them out like candy and they can have their own. we have a whole department who had the job of noticing when fraud is taking place. Although um, we do a box of cards for regulars who hate to care them haha and the one guy was like do you have a card for steve in there and im like Sure, I know he isn't steve but well he said he was steve maybe he is steves friend either way it is no "randomly" using the card for my own benefit. Which is what I might have been doing one night to boost my rates and I was accussed of throwing cards away/forcing people to take them by the store theif, who wants me out because I pay attention to all her transactions because she makes a lot of "honest" mistakes..... and our coworkers who leave money in the office ALWAYS have some amount missing between 2-50$

[Jester]

What my wallet would probably tell people about me, if I was to leave it somewhere--which, fortunately, I don't do. Anymore.

I have 2 Visa cards from the same bank.
I play Golden Tee a lot.
I have a weird obsession with two dollar bills.
I am an ordained minister.
I love beer.
I love movies.
I hate covers at bars. Well, you could tell this if you knew that the one card is good for skipping covers at a local bar. One might assume that I frequent this place often, but that would be an erroneous assumption.
I am an insured driver.
I am a licensed driver.
I live in an apartment.
I love books.
I don't throw shit away as often as I should.
I drive a Chevy Blazer.
And I would love to see what assumptions people would draw from the lone Jack of Spades playing card that hangs out in my wallet.

Cashier: *huffily slams all the paperwork to the side and sulks through the transaction without a word*

Horrible customer service, horrible attitude, horrible employee. This is the kind of person that makes customers into SCs, frankly. Or ex-customers of that business.