Next time I will ask how's it hanging...

[DisgruntledBadger]

There was once a customer who called the-pizza-shop-formerly-known-as-mine to order a pizza. I answered the phone and did my usual smiley "Thank you for calling Thus-and-such Pizza; would you like to place an order for pickup or delivery?" Call proceed in the normal fashion, with me being sure to do the "yes ma'am" and "no ma'am" and all that good polite stuff. She came in to pick up her pizza about twenty minutes later and apparently didn't realize that I was the one she'd spoken to over the phone. She kinda gave me a funny look and said, "I don't know who answered the phone, but you should fire her. She was offensively cheerful." Lady paid for her pizza, left a dollar in the cook tip jar, and wandered on out. I was a little confused...but hey, at least she tipped the cooks, so I don't figure she rates as a sucky customer. Just an odd one.

[Jester]

George Carlin has a routine on his "Playin' With Your Head" CD called "Hello and Goodbye" about all the wonderful ways we have to greet and bid farewell to one another. He talks about the "How's your hammer hanging?" one:

"You can't really say that to a woman. Unless, of course, you're talking to a female carpenter. Then, it's perfectly okay! Actually, I've always wanted to say that to a high church official. 'Good evening, your Excellency. How hangs the hammer?'"

Somehow that seemed appropriate here.

[chainedbarista]

i'd hate to get him for confession...

[tollbaby]

In the ideal world, they get noticed and removed from positions of authority. Of course, in the ideal world, chocolate woudn't be fattening, either.

What??? Chocolate is NOT fattening!!!!!

*looks down*

aw crap.

[Gurndigarn]

Members of any clergy are as human as the rest of us. They have their strengths, their weaknesses, and the little voices in the backs of their heads with some really odd suggestions that most of the time you want to ignore.

You're supposed to ignore them? So that's what I've been doing wrong all these years.

Rapscallion

Only most of the time. True wisdom is recognizing when those voices have really, really good ideas.

[XCashier]

Wow. Even I've never been THAT much of a bitch.

Decent folks reserve bitchiness only for those who deserve it. Like the sweet little old lady's wonderful response.

In the ideal world, they get noticed and removed from positions of authority. Of course, in the ideal world, chocolate woudn't be fattening, either.

That's for sure!

[Rapscallion]

Members of any clergy are as human as the rest of us. They have their strengths, their weaknesses, and the little voices in the backs of their heads with some really odd suggestions that most of the time you want to ignore.

You're supposed to ignore them? So that's what I've been doing wrong all these years.

Rapscallion

[kerrisan]

How is an unstable man like that allowed out in public?

[Gurndigarn]

I second that Whiskey Tango Foxtrot. And he was a priest? I can't believe a priest would act that way. Unless he was a nutbag posing as a priest.

Members of any clergy are as human as the rest of us. They have their strengths, their weaknesses, and the little voices in the backs of their heads with some really odd suggestions that most of the time you want to ignore.

In the ideal world, they get noticed and removed from positions of authority. Of course, in the ideal world, chocolate woudn't be fattening, either.

[Getoutofmylobby]

I second that Whiskey Tango Foxtrot. And he was a priest? I can't believe a priest would act that way. Unless he was a nutbag posing as a priest. Like that movie with Sean Penn and Robert DeNiro.

What a psycho! If he really was a priest I'd hate to see how he handles confessions.

"Forgive me father for I have sinned. It has been..."
"What?!?!?! SINS! Don't come to me with your goddamn sins!!"
"But you're a..."
" I DON'T RESPOND WELL TO SINS! AIIEEEEEEE!!!" <runs out of confessional naked with "God Rulz" tattooed on his butt>

[Mongo Skruddgemire]

Priest huh?

Granted that I haven't been one in a long time, but don't Christians follow that whole "Do unto others as you would have them do on to you" thing?

Or what about Matthew 19:19 which says "honor thy father and thy mother; and, thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself."

So Whiskey Tango Foxtrot was this guy's problem with you being good, nice, and friendly with other people? If you ever encounter this schmuck again and he's still in a nasty mood just remember Matthew 19:19. They hate it when you use their own weapons against them.

Mongo

[RavenStarr]

I wonder how he would respond to being told "God bless you".

I agree with Katie, not only a freak but scary too. I think you should find out what church he's at and then go visit one Sunday. When you see him, you should say something like: "OMG you really are a priest!!! That settles it then I'm gonna become an atheist."

[AirHostess]

OMG what a freak!

[Antisocial_Worker]

'DON'T ASK ME THAT!!!!!!!!!!! I DON'T RESPOND WELL TO QUESTIONS LIKE THAT!!!!!!!!!!'

Wow... I had a boyfriend like that briefly. It was a long distance thing and he came to visit me here to see if he liked me and where I live enough to keep things going. When I asked the big question -- whether he liked me and where I live enough to keep things going -- he replied that it wasn't fair to ask him that sort of question, that he couldn't make that kind of decision, that it was too much pressure to ask, etc.

From there he devolved, until he was replying that way when I asked him if he would prefer Coke to Pepsi, or if he wanted anything to drink at all.

I dearly hope he's since been put into a nice, reputable institution. Freaking nutbag.

[Becks]

Don't feel too bad about it hon, the first customer that made me cry was a gal whom I'd wished a good day to after cashing her out. She grabbed her bag and started walking away, then CAME BACK to hiss at me, "Quit being so f*cking happy!"

Wow. Even I've never been THAT much of a bitch.