Don't Let Them Take Booze in the Bathroom...

[dalesys]

There are also other mind-affecting substances which can be absorbed that way...

Nicotine, for an oldie but goodie.

[silverstaff]

I imagine it would be fairly easy to pass a breathalyzer then. Still damn stupid.

SC

Negative.

Breathalyzers work by detecting the blood alcohol level because alcohol is emitted in vapor form through the mucous membranes in the mouth.

As long as they haven't orally consumed alcohol within the last few minutes there will be no difference between use of oral and rectal/vaginal alcohol consumption for purposes of a breathalyzer.

People will try that though, since it's an urban legend that you can beat a test that way. It's a little like the morons who drink bleach because supposedly you can use that to cheat a urine test, while in reality all you do is get a ticket to the ER and maybe the morgue.

[Flying Grype]

Re: tampons: I call BS. Can alcohol be absorbed into the bloodstream vaginally? Even if it could, it would burn like hell. There was a great article on Cracked not long ago about these "guess what your kids are doing" scare stories.

http://www.cracked.com/blog/a-letter...n-crazes-news/

[Dave1982]

Can alcohol be absorbed into the bloodstream vaginally?

Try asking the MythBusters THAT one!

[BeenThereDoneThat]

Try asking the MythBusters THAT one!

For some reason I can imagine Jamie turning BRIGHT red...maybe Adam too but I think he'd laugh hysterically first

[Jay 2K Winger]

For some reason I can imagine Jamie turning BRIGHT red...maybe Adam too but I think he'd laugh hysterically first

The whole team would turn bright red! I can just imagine Adam giggling over it, blushing, and then going, "Hey, Kari, could you--?" And her just cutting him off with a straight "No."

[BeenThereDoneThat]

I think Kari would just go EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW and run away screaming.

[dalesys]

I think Kari would just go EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW and run away screaming.

Can't run very well with legs crossed tight.

[BeenThereDoneThat]

Can't run very well with legs crossed tight.

Hah! She probably wears a chastity belt whenever she has to work with that lot

[ackmeow]

Hah! If that became a myth, Adam and Jamie would rig up a crane magnet and hide it in a mattress so when she passed by if she wore a belt she would fly to the mattress cartoon style.

[wolfie]

I had.

There are also other mind-affecting substances which can be absorbed that way.

ER staff take note.....

Everyone know the stereotype about witches flying on broomsticks? This is where that originated. Witches (female practicioners of a pre-Christian religion) prepared a hallucinogenic ointment which was absorbed through contact with mucous membranes. One common hallucination is that the drugged person is flying. A convenient way to apply an ointment to a certain tubular mucous membrane was to smear it on a stick and insert the stick through the opening of the membrane. This "flying after putting a stick between their legs" was Bowlderized into flying while sitting on a broom.

It's a little like the morons who drink bleach because supposedly you can use that to cheat a urine test, while in reality all you do is get a ticket to the ER and maybe the morgue.

This is a case of "a little knowledge is a dangerous thing". In the early days of urine tests for drugs, people would fool the test by contaminating the urine sample with bleach. This changed the PH of the urine so that the reagents wouldn't react properly, and produce a false negative. Of course, the testers got wise to this, and a sample with PH outside the normal range for human urine (just like one that's outside the normal temperature range for freshly captured specimen) will now be flagged as "substituted/adulterated sample", which is an automatic fail even if no drug residue is found. There were other substances (such as Goldenseal - which is now tested for) which could be taken orally as masking agents - considering the level of intelligence displayed by people under the influence of recreational pharmaceuticals, it's not surprising that the (no longer valid) "add bleach to your sample to produce a negative" morphed into "drink bleach to produce a negative".

I suspect something similar is behind a thread I read soon after joining, but couldn't comment on because it was closed. Vinegar Boy probably didn't understand that there was a difference between Malt Vinegar and Malt Liquor.

[Jester]

Did you see the guy come out of the bathroom without the bottle? Or did you simply see him later, and not actually witness him exiting the bathroom? The reason I ask is that, to me, the most logical solution to what happened is that he pitched the bottle in a trash can somewhere in the store, other than the bathroom trash can...assuming, of course, the store has trash cans outside of the bathrooms. If not, I got no idea on that one.

As for the booze tampons, I first heard about this earlier this year from some bar customers, and as much as I partied when I was younger (and still do), this seems utterly stupid. I mean, as mentioned, it's somewhat dangerous. Plus part of the fun of partying is enjoying what you're drinking (though not everyone enjoys the taste of alcoholic beverages) and socializing. "Hey, pass me a cold one" seems a lot more social than "Hey Zack, help me jam this alcohol soaked tampon up my keister."

I believe the reasoning behind the booze tampons is that the cops (or your parents, depending upon your age and who you're trying to fool) won't smell alcohol on your breath. Also, some may believe it would help with the breathalyzer, which at least one person here has refuted. I don't know whether it would or it wouldn't, but that doesn't matter, and here's why: even if you can get by the breathalyzer, and even if a cop doesn't smell booze on your breath, those are only PART of the sobriety tests that they administer. The booze tampon in no way addresses the other several methods police officers have of determining incapacity. There's a reason cops put suspected drunk drivers through multiple tests, and not just one or two.

And by the way, even if you have no alcohol in your system, even if you haven't drank a drop, or the cops can't prove that you have, you can still be arrested, tried, and convicted of driving while impaired. And one can be impaired in a number of ways, including various drugs, legal and illegal, lack of sleep, etc. That is why so many jurisdictions use DWI (driving while impaired) rather than DUI (driving under the influence, i.e., drunk). DWI covers a broader range of impairments.

[Ironclad Alibi]

Did you see the guy come out of the bathroom without the bottle? Or did you simply see him later, and not actually witness him exiting the bathroom? The reason I ask is that, to me, the most logical solution to what happened is that he pitched the bottle in a trash can somewhere in the store, other than the bathroom trash can...assuming, of course, the store has trash cans outside of the bathrooms. If not, I got no idea on that one.

He may have just stashed the empty bottle behind some products on a shelf, where it will be discovered after hiding there for several months.

[emax4]

This was proved on "Manswers" some years ago, as I recall seeing the episode myself. Here's the link:

http://www.spike.com/video-clips/lte...t-drunk-faster

[PepperElf]

Among the various gems, I discovered that the fastest way to get drunk is to basically give yourself an alcohol enema.

I heard that the new "in" thing in high schools is to wear alcohol-soaked tampons ... with the same results as using the enema... it bypasses the digestive system and it's impossible to test for via breathalyzer since your breath remains alcohol-free.

Both the tampon and enema delivery system though can be fatal. Barfing after drinking too much is a safety mechanism that expels the excess alcohol... But if it's not in your stomach to begin with you have no means to get rid of it except time... so you can get alcohol poisoning much more easily.