Intro:
This happened a few months ago, and the longer I thought on it the less I felt like the terrible situation was entirely my fault.
When I was a lot younger, I tried to get regular babysitting jobs. But there weren't enough kids in my neighborhood, and I gave up on it. So two months ago I got a call asking if I could babysit for them. I had babysat for them before, and it was a great experience all-around, so I agreed. They added that it would be from 4 to 11, and I explained that I worked until 6, and would have to see if I could get off.
The Day Before:
I came down to meet the mother and their two dogs the day before.
They also explain that they have given up their home phone for cell phones, and wanted me to have my cell phone on at all times so they could call me. I gave them my number (after finding it).
They talk to me a bit about their daughter, and I ended up adding that I learned to read when I was their daughter's age. They asked me how, and I said that my parents read to me every night, and when I watched TV, they turned the subtitles on. They joked that I would get a bonus if I taught her how to read.
The only foreseeable issue at this point was that the mother was so pregnant she could go into labor at any moment, and could go into labor while they were out, meaning I'd spend all night with their kid.
I didn't imagine the cell phone thing would be an issue, because I didn't imagine they'd need to call me before I could work out where I'd get service in their house.
4:00-5:00
I show up early with my sister the day of, because I cannot get off work. As they knew this was a possibility, they were fine with it. I let them meet her and her meet the child. I explain to her what they explained to me, and everything is good.
After two hours, I show up. My mom has texted me saying the mother is freaking out.
I gave my sister my cell phone, so they would only have to contact us with one number. I specifically tell her this is what that is for. After I leave, they ask her for her cell phone number, and refuse to let her say that she has my cell phone, and doesn't know what the number is, but knows that they already know. They would not let her say anything besides a phone number, and in desperation, she gives out our home phone number.
My sister leaves.
5:00
So about a half hour after I arrive, Mom texts me saying that the mother has left a message on our machine and is extremely upset because she cannot reach my sister or me.
I check my cell phone, and it has no service. Because we live in the middle of nowhere. Cell service is notoriously scattered here, which is why it is stupid to even have a cell phone here, much less one that replaces your land-line.
I find a place that does have service, and find a message from her on my cell phone. I call her and she berates me for not answering my cell phone, saying she was sure that we had all died or something. I try to explain that I didn't receive the call, but I know a place I can leave my cell phone that will have service now. I assure her that her daughter is fine, has eaten a little, and is pretty cheerful.
6:00
I give her daughter some milk and start to cut up an apple and put together a bagel, which is my dinner, because that is all that was in my house. Their dogs take my bagel off the table and eat it.
8:00
Now the little girl starts having fits, running to the door and screaming at it. I look at the time, and it's now eight. I put her in her pajamas, because she knocks over a plant and spills water on her clothes. I try to read to her, and explain that her parents are coming back, as she cannot speak words, but what she is screaming vaguely sounds like "ma-ma" and "Da-da."
9:00
She's getting more and more upset that her parents are gone, and I decide to put her to bed. I lead her to her bedroom, and place her in her bed. I sit down and explain that, if she falls asleep, when she wakes up, her parents will be there. I stay with her until she has fallen asleep, rubbing her back to try and keep her calm.
Just as I start wondering why I'm trying to reason with a girl who isn't even potty-trained yet, she seems to accept this, and goes to bed.
11:15
Just as I was wondering if I was being psychic yesterday, they come in.
They are surprised their daughter is even in bed, and asks what time she went to bed. I told them nine, and the mother is mad. She says her daughter will wake her up in the middle of the night.
No-one told me this. I was told I could put her to bed anytime, and if she cried for longer than ten minutes, to take her back to bed.
The mother pays me, and even tips me. She admits this is the first time she has let someone babysit her kid.
Well, that would have been nice to know up-front.
Then she bitches about my sister's brain burp, and I say: "Well, when she was your daughter's age, she was severely Autistic. With intervention and treatment she has moved up the spectrum drastically, and is pretty high functioning now, but sometimes she doesn't always get what everyone means." Then she finally shuts up.
Conclusion:
I mean, yeah, there were some things I could have done to make this better. I could have told them myself that she had my cell phone before I ran back to work. I could have turned down the job (which I rather wish I did.) I could have told them up-front that my sister has a condition, but she hadn't had an issue in about a year with it until that day. I shouldn't have mentioned it at all since I knew ahead of time it wouldn't come into play, but I just hoped that if I mentioned my sister had a condition she'd STFU.
On their hand, they could have recognized that cell phones come with their own set of issues. The father said that their daughter was prone to stealing cell phones and dunking them in toilets. That was much more likely to have happened than anything the mother should have worried about. Two, they must have known cell reception in their house was crap, and could have told me where I could get it. Three, they could have let my sister talk.
And fourthly, they could have told me that their daughter had never been babysat by a stranger before. Because, while I may not have ages and ages behind my belt of babysitting, in fact, they were well aware I hardly had any babysitting jobs, but was red-cross trained, it is just common sense that this may cause issues and I should be aware of it. And when their child is being babysat for the first time, maybe don't leave for such a long time, especially if you expected her to be awake the whole time. And if you expected her to be awake the whole time, COMMUNICATE THAT TO ME.
Seriously.
TL;DNR
Communication is required. Do not tell me she can go to bed anytime, then get upset that she was put to bed at a specific time, which is utterly reasonable, seeing as when I was her age, I was put to bed four hours earlier than when I put her to bed.
Also, do not refuse to let someone talk unless they give you information you already have, then get upset when they give you the wrong information. (If you had a land-line, that problem would have been a non-issue entirely.)
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