Quoth Mongo Skruddgemire
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Bike horns and pet toys
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EVE Online: 99% of the time you sit around waiting for something to happen, but that 1% of action is what hooks people like crack, you don't get interviewed by the BBC for a WoW raid.
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Quoth bainsidhe View PostThe same can be said of those dancing/singing toys around the holidays, especially at Christmas. I know I wanted to kill customers and especially employees that would hit buttons on ten different toys and then just walk away. It's cute the first time, not when it happens a hundred times in a single shift.
And yet strangely, I'm drawn to the damn things and will hit a bunch of buttons before I realize what I'm doing and slink away. Sorry employees (especially Hallmark!)The large print giveth, and the small print taketh away.
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Several Christmases ago, one of the swamp's buyers, whom I sincerely hope is now either emptying dumpsters or eating out of them, decided we should be THE go-to store for annoying, singing, dancing toys and chotchkies.
We had them all. The big-mouth Billy bass. The pickup truck with a deer strapped to the hood and two hunters inside. The hunter or fisherman with a big fish or deer on his back forcing him to sing and dance. There were others I don't recall. They arrived in huge quantities, and were placed together in a single section that we employees steered clear of because it attracted every mouth-breathing yahoo in town that enjoyed playing with them and setting them all off at once to make an ear-splitting racket, and then walked away and didn't buy any.
And then after Christmas was over there was still a glut of these damn things at the DC, so they sent us more because a proven fact that we sell clearance items at a much higher rate than other stores do.
There was also Buck (I think that was his name), which was a stuffed-and-mounted deer head on a plaque that told bad jokes when you pushed a button. Or something. Corporate had high high hopes for this thing. They sent down a memo instructing us to clear off a front endstand in sporting good RIGHT NAO so Buck could be prominently displayed on it. The memo also mentioned, with great enthusiasm, that a couple stores in our district managed to sell one or two of them, so they felt people would be tearing the doors off their hinges to buy Buck the talking deer head.
We didn't sell a single one until they went on clearance and got marked down a couple times, and probably ended up sending some back once they hit their out of stock date.Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.
"I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily
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While working at Guitar Center, I tested the Ops manager's sense of humor, which was nil. Yamaha had this karaoke keyboard which had a microphone attached to it. Any kid knows that with a microphone, a speaker, and the "record" button on, you can make some funny howling noises.
I put the microphone above the keyboard in the right position, so when the ops manager came in and turned on the lights and appliances, you could hear this obnoxious howling sound.
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Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh View Post
We had them all. The big-mouth Billy bass.
Not long after, I turned the TV on, and saw an ad for one of those things. It was one of those extra-long ads (not really an infomercial), and went on and on, this particular one even came with extra CDs of songs, and it went over all the things it sang. I honestly thought I had turned the TV to some sort of Saturday Night Life type of commercial parody. I kept waiting for the next skit. I really never imagined it was an honest to goodness item being advertised for sale. It just seemed way too ludicrous. Sigh.
Madness takes it's toll....
Please have exact change ready.
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Quoth Ironclad Alibi View PostLooks like the kid out-SCed his patents.
But Screaming Kid just wore them down.PWNADE(TM) - Serve up a glass today! | PWNZER - An act of pwnage so awesome, it's like the victim got hit by a tank.
There are only Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse because I choose to walk!
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