Dear....

[Giggle Goose]

Dear person my ex supposedly had an affair with,

Show yourself. I don't bite.

Love,
GG

PS: I want proof.

[Amethyst Hunter]

Dear Kusanagi, Gravekeeper, Saydrah, and anyone else currently having a rough time,

:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

It's not much, but it's something?

--

Dear Tension Headache,

You wore out your welcome well within the first 24 hours of your descent 4 days ago. NOW GO AWAY ALREADY DAMMIT!!!!!!!!!!!!

--

Dear Allergies,

You still suck. Bite me.

--

Dear former hometown,

AAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

You wanted it, you got it. No sympathy here.

--

Dear money,

I miss you very, very, very, very, very, very much. Please to be coming back asap?

--

Dear car,

I miss you too. Sadly, if we ever do get back together again, I won't be able to take you out as often thanks to the gasfuckery going on.

--

[JessEm]

Dear Boy,

I give you the "come hither" eyes every time you look at me. I smile at you, talk to you, tease you affectionately. I even listen to your favourite (Dog-awful) experimental Jazz. I KNOW you like me. I have made the first moves. I have made moves 1 through 10. For fuck's sake, GET THE MESSAGE!!! If you don't get your act together, I'm running off with my Doctor Who fan.

Yours,
A crush.

Dear Doctor Who Fan,

You're HAWT. Almost as hot as David Tennant.

Yours,
A fellow nerd.

Dear Kus,

Get yourself to someone who can look after you, STAT. What will happen if you collapse? At least have someone call you every now and then to make sure you're not, you know, dead.

A worried fan-club member.

[XCashier]

Dear Doctor Who Fan,

You're HAWT. Almost as hot as David Tennant.

Yours,
A fellow nerd.

Dear Jess,

May I humbly suggest you go with the Doctor Who fan? I never regretted marrying mine.

XCashier

[Becks]

Dear new frames,

OK, . You apparently have two adjustable settings: too loose or too tight. And yet you felt fine when I chose you from the whole damn selection available.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

You still really accentuate my eyes, though.

:sigh:

[monolayth]

Dear Jess,



XCashier

heehee, I thought you were talking to me for a second...


Dear co-worker,

Yes I am being nice and giving you a ride everyday. I am not about to let a 5 month along pregnant woman take the bus when your on my way. You say you are getting a new car the next day every day. Yet I am still giving you a ride. I have no problems with this. If you are really meaning to get a new car then do so. I get tired of hearing the same excuse every day. I really don't care. So seriously stop it.

Still giving you a ride,

Monolayth

[ShinyGreenApple]

Dear nephew,

You're funny. First, you said you didn't want to watch the movie I picked out from the library, but you did anyways. And in my defense, I promise and swear on my life that I had absolutely no earthly idea that this particular film featured so many scenes of a gleefully pantsless Geoffrey Rush. On the other hand, you overreacted about simply seeing a few quick flashes of man-butt. It's a butt and a rather nice one too, I might add! we all have one, we all know what they look like. No biggie. And I'm sure you wouldn't have thought it so repulsive if it were Evangeline Lilly or Keira Knightley jumping on a trampoline and wearing nothing but a coat. Other than that though, I'm glad you enjoyed the movie otherwise though you were determined not to.

Thanks for the laughs,

Your quirky aunt, the Rush fan.

[the_std]

Dear Boything,

Yes, the "Buy It Now!" button on e-Bay does, in fact, mean that, if you click that button, you will buy it now. It does not mean that you will fill in some forms, have time to think about it and go for a stroll through the park.

So now you have the World of Warcraft: Burning Crusade Collector's Edition with an art book and a map and a deck of cards and the game... Yet you don't play the game. But you will now. Cause you bought it, even if you bought it "by accident". Even if you just clicked the button "because there was a button".

Laughing and totally confused/amused,
Me

[ArenaBoy]

Dear friends, family, and random people.

Tonight is Red Wings-Avalanche. I will be on that couch watching it. Between the hours of 7 PM - 11 PM contacting me via instant messenger, cell phone, land line, e-mail, semaphore, smoke signals, telegram, morse code, pigeon, drums, and yelling with expecting me to respond will be as likely expecting Andrei Shevchenko (soccer reference) to score a hat trick on Saturday. I am not missing this game. No way. With that said, GO RED WINGS!

PS. Dear Chelsea Football Club, please beat United on Saturday.

[Lace Neil Singer]

Dear Fuckwit,

It may come as a surprise to you, but when someone on a motorbike slows down to take a tight bend, that is NOT an invitation to barge right past them in your Jaguar, which is in all likelyhood compensating for your being hung like a Ken doll. One day you'll try that trick with the wrong person and get what passes for your brains beaten out.

Annoyed at idiots who try to kill me,

LNS

[the_std]

Dear School,
HAHAHAHA! I HAVE NEARLY DEFEATED YOU!

Tonight was my last class, and I graduate in August. And I will be free. Free! FREEEEE!

HA!,
Me

[Becks]

Dear new glasses (again) and/or my local seller of said glasses,

Uh, yeah. So...

Yep.

I'm back to wearing my old glasses. Hell, I spent a good chunk of my workday not wearing my glasses at all.

I'm tired of having to get my frames readjusted. It sucks. And it's NOT WORKING. The tightness sucks and I think part of my ears are getting irritated. WHY?!?!?!?!?

I'm thinking of taking them back and seeing what can be done.

I didn't realize how comfy my old glasses were until I got the new ones.

:sigh:

[Bella_Vixen]

Dear left ear peircing--

Thank you for stopping bleeding.

Much relieved--

Me




************************************************** ******

[Amethyst Hunter]

Dear money,

I miss you very, very, very, very, very, very much. Please to be coming back asap?

Dear money,

THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUILOVEYOULO VEYOULOVEYOULOVEYOULOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVEYOOOOOO OOOOUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!! *hugkisshugkisshugkisshugkisskisskisskisskisskiss*

--

Dear people of the world who think that money can't buy happiness,

AAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!

[JessEm]

Dear Jess,

May I humbly suggest you go with the Doctor Who fan? I never regretted marrying mine.

XCashier

Dear XCashier,

Believe me, if I was sure of his affections, we'd be married by the end of the week!
He's a Tom Baker fan. Soooo dreeeaamy.....

Nerdy Love,
JessEm


Dear Monolayth,
ZOMG another Jess! Be my BFF KTHANXBAI
Love,
Jess

Dear people of the world who think that money can't buy happiness,

AAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!

I'd just like to add a post-script to your letter:

PS - You clearly don't know where to shop. Love, JessEm xxx