Your best pranks?

[dalesys]

After light out whilst beginning snuggliez© I told my wife the sad story of coworker's little brother, who worked in a body shop.

The day before his wedding the painted his equipment.*

All *I* said was, "That sounded so cool, I painted mine."

Screech! Lights On! Desperate attempt to remove blankets from laughing fool...


* I've always wondered: did they use Metalflake Cherry Red of Candy Apple Green?

[Jester]

All this talk about high school, and I forgot to mention one of my first pranks, which I did my junior year, at my second of three high schools.

I was part of a history class that was notorious throughout the school. Because somehow a lot of the worst troublemakers (not me, not yet) had been gathered together in one class. And that class was taught by one of the worst teachers of all time, a man by the name of "Dan Endicott." (No, it's not his real name.) How notorious was this class? Typical hallway conversation:

"What are you doing second hour?"
"I'm in Endicott's class."
"Wait, what? You're in second hour Endicott?!?!? Holy shit!"

This poor man was clueless, and while he tried to teach, he had zero leadership skills. None. And no clue what he was up against. To try to teach us history, he'd have games, like game show type games. Which involved teams. And him handing out noisemakers to members of the teams. Noisemakers. Troublemakers. What could possibly go wrong?

In short, everything. Most of the class was not there to learn. Even the few of us who were were highly amused by the antics of the rest, and bemused by the hapless Endicott, who we as a class simply dubbed "Dan Dan."

"What's up, Dan Dan?"
"That's Mr. Endicott."
"Okay, Dan Dan."

It was the closest to Fast Times at Ridgemont High I've ever been. But Endicott, try as he might, was no Mr. Hand.

And one day, I don't remember why, I decided to get in on the action. The night beforehand, I snuck onto school grounds, and on the outside of the window near the front of Endicott's classroom, I taped up a Playboy centerfold. Facing in, of course. Due to the position of the sun in the morning, at the end of the day, the blinds to that room were always down, so that in the morning people would not be blinded. So, unless someone noticed something from the next wing over, I had a good chance of it not being found before second hour.

And it wasn't! The blinds were down, Miss February was in place, and I clued in the guy sitting near the window. And while Dan Dan cluelessly lectured, the window guy slowly worked the blind when Dan Dan wasn't looking, until finally it was up enough to show the Playmate in all her glory.

A few of the guys noticed first. And slowly but surely, a ruckus began. ("Can you describe the ruckus?") Because, being teenagers, they were giggling, making crass comments, and so on. And it still took Endicott a bit to figure out something was up. And when he finally noticed that everyone's attention was not only not on him, but was clearly on the windows, he turned away from the blackboard and saw the window smut I had so carefully planted.

And he reacted swifter than I'd ever seen him react. He zipped right over to the window to snatch that centerfold down...except his hand grabbed nothing but empty glass. Remember, I had taped her to the OUTSIDE of the window. And by this time, the class across the courtyard in the next wing had noticed the commotion in our classroom, and they were dying laughing.

Realizing the paper porn was out of his reach (these windows did not open), Dan Dan taped some dark paper over our side of the window, and eventually (I imagine) went outside to remove her.

I never got caught. Dan Dan never found out who pulled that one. But he had his hands full with the rest of the year, trying to teach the most notorious classroom in the building.

While he wasn't that old, Mr. Endicott retired a year after our infamous run with him. I'm not saying we had anything to do with it. But, I'm not saying we didn't, either. I don't know. But I do know that that man was not cut out to be a teacher. His heart was in the right place. But his abilities were not up to snuff. Which is why, all these years later, while I know I should feel terrible about my part in his torture, I really don't.

I hope he found a vocation more suited to him, though. I really do.

The best/worst of the saran wrap incidents would have to be hoisting an entire bedframe, mattress, sleeping bag and cousellor to the top of the flagpole and leaving them there to await the morning flag raising.

Um, how did they get him up there?!?

Probably the best one I ever pulled was taking about half a skein of yarn and turning my brother's bedroom into a giant spiderweb while he was out visiting friends.

When I lived in the dorms at college, my wing had an ongoing prank war with another wing. We always won, because (a) they were lazy, (b) they were uncreative, and (c) one of our cohorts was actually a resident of that wing, but he hung out with us and really didn't like them, so we had an inside man. This last bit helped the night when, around 3 am, he let us into their (locked) wing and helped us do the yarn spiderweb thing the entire length of their hall, which was probably a good 100 yards or so. (20 rooms on each side the entire length of the hall....you do the math.)

The first two factors came into play at other times. Like the time they stole our shower heads....which they only stole from one of our two bathrooms. We simply showered in the second one, and with the help of our inside man, retrieved our stolen hygiene equipment, and promptly stole ALL of their shower heads. They were unamused.

The dorm pranks were not limited to wing vs. wing. Oftentimes it was internal. A common one was stealing someone's towel and/or clothes while they were showering in the communal bathroom. This happened to me once. Annoyed, I very calmly took down the shower curtain, wrapped it around myself, and strode down the hall to my room, very much not as naked or embarrassed as they'd expected. Bitch, please.

When the brother was serving in the army...

After hearing muffled conversations the door flew open and he heard "PRIVATE!!!!" The CO DID say it was a great prank though.....

A friend of mine down here is the source for most of Skippy's List, i.e., the Things He Is No Longer Allowed To Do In The Army. My friend says that, while he is not the site owner, most of these stories originated with him, and his friend is either the site owner or a friend of the owner's. I don't know all the details, but I do know that, as funny as this list is to read (and I dare you to read it and not laugh your silly little ass off), it is far, far funnier to have told to you, especially when the guy telling you can provide an entire story for each thing he is Not Allowed To Do. (This, and the general no nonsense/no bullshit nature of my friend, is why I believe him when he tells me this mostly originated with him.)

And no, his real name is neither Skippy nor Shwarz.

And, in case you're wondering, yes, I am re-reading this list for the first time in years. And despite the fact that I've read it before, AND had several of the stories told to me in more colorful detail, I am still laughing so hard that I can't see through the tears! And by the way, the back story behind #137 and #138 was especially hilarious. Sadly, I do not really remember the details. Ditto #204. And some others...

I wrapped a necklace in its regular box and progressively larger (all giftwrapped, of course) boxes--seven or eight in all.

My family did this to my little sister one year at Christmas. We were all gathered at the parents' house in Phoenix. Lil Sis lived in New York at the time. And she really, desperately wanted a tv. So, come present time we're all exchanging presents, and Lil Sis, who has always designated herself The Elf (the one who hands out the presents) was getting more and more agitated, as every present was designated for someone other than herself. Finally, she got to The Biggest Box Under The Tree. And lo and behold, it had HER name on it! Hot damn! So, she unwrapped it. And in it....was an almost as big box, also wrapped. Puzzled, she unwrapped that. And of course there was yet another box in THAT one! And the nesting boxes continued, each one being smaller than the last, each one causing my sister more consternation, and the living room more clutter, as there was a metric shit ton of wrapping paper and boxes everywhere. Finally she got down to a box that was small enough to hide a cheese grater in. Tearing it open, she found...a picture of a tv. Completely lost, she looked at us in bewilderment. At which point we asked her a simple question: just how would she get a tv back to New York on a plane? And that is when it dawned on her that the tv in the picture (from a catalog) was being shipped to her home in New York.

Even my Mom got in on that one, which is very uncharacteristic of her!

Well a classmate of mine started snoring during a lecture. I went to not only tie his shoelaces together but looped them around a leg of the stool. The instructor realized what I was doing and set the clock a couple hours ahead and quietly ushered us all to the library where he continued his lecture.

I had a teacher in junior high school who, when a student was dozing or not paying attention, would quietly dip his hand in his drinking water, quietly ease up to the student in question, and loudly fake a sneeze, flinging the water from his hand on to the student's head. The reactions of the startled (and disgusted) victims was PRICELESS!

the Annoy-a-tron...

That, and its cousins, the Annoy-a-tron 2.0 and the Evil-tron, are AWESOME! Thank you for showing me this. The possibilities in the bar I work in are ENDLESS.

[lordlundar]

A friend of mine down here is the source for most of Skippy's List,

Why, oh why does this not surprise me?

Heh. My graduating class did the same thing. About 380 students. On a raised, wooden stage. In a concert hall....

Where did you go to school at? This sounds suspiciously the same as my incident.

[Jester]

It's Key West. It's a freak magnet. A saying I've heard on multiple occasions is "When God shakes the U.S., those who can't hang on fall down to Key West." Which has some major truth to it.

And I just finished retreading the whole list, and am still sniffling and wiping the tears from my eyes.

[Crossbow]

Where did you go to school at? This sounds suspiciously the same as my incident.

Rather affluent suburb in Western NY... If you're from the same school, that should be enough info.

[lordlundar]

Rather affluent suburb in Western NY... If you're from the same school, that should be enough info.

Okay, nowhere near it. Guess no one can resist the classics.

[Deserted]

The dorm pranks were not limited to wing vs. wing. Oftentimes it was internal. A common one was stealing someone's towel and/or clothes while they were showering in the communal bathroom. This happened to me once. Annoyed, I very calmly took down the shower curtain, wrapped it around myself, and strode down the hall to my room, very much not as naked or embarrassed as they'd expected. Bitch, please.

I would've just walked around nude. Take my clothes? Suffer the consequences.

I had a teacher in junior high school who, when a student was dozing or not paying attention, would quietly dip his hand in his drinking water, quietly ease up to the student in question, and loudly fake a sneeze, flinging the water from his hand on to the student's head. The reactions of the startled (and disgusted) victims was PRICELESS!

The only time I got caught sleeping in class, my freshman or sophomore year, the teacher slammed a book on the table right next to my head. Thought I'd have a heart attack!

[bhskittykatt]

Never was in a dorm, but Mom has some good stores. Her friend in the dorm across the hall from her wanted to prank her roommate by removing all the furniture. There was enough furniture in Mom's dorm for the friend's bed, but for the friend's roommate's bed they enlisted the help of the RA to hide it in secured storage. Then the RA suddenly became very busy and unavailable to unlock said storage.

Speaking of roommate pranks, Halloween is approaching, and Hubs (the closest thing I've ever had to a roommate) has a habit of rigging things to jump out at me when I come home. He's very good at rigging up cables and pulleys to the door, and I startle easily. I'm sure the neighbors love it when I come home at midnight and scream as Undead Weird Al* jumps out at me. (*That's the best way to describe this particular ghoul we found one year. It's the hair. It wears a top hat, too. It's as weird as it sounds.)

[BearLeeBadenaugh]

Um, how did they get him up there?!?

Well, that was a bit of fun. One of my jobs at the camp was maintenance, and when the flagpole is an 90' tall pole chunk o wood that's 50 years old, you need to keep it painted for preservation. We had put a large pulley sheave on the top to make that job easier (use the flag lanyard to pull up a climbing rope) and the nefarious uses weren't far behind. The counsellor was saran wrapped and duct taped to his bed and a set of stretcher straps was clipped to the corners of the bedframe. it definitely doesn't pay to be a deep sleeper at a prank filled scout camp.


Dunno why it springs to mind, but the scout camp reminds me of shaving cream stab-and-lobs. All you need is a can of shaving cream and an icepick. With a little bit of practice, you can get your stab such that it will pierce the can and wedge, so the pick plugs the hole until you're ready. Yank the pick out and toss the now-spraying can into the target area. Outhouses and tents were our preferred targets, lol.

[Aethian]

Back in the 60's my Mom was in college in fact she went to Michigan State University of Agriculture and Applied Science. (The university was changed to Michigan State University in 1964.) Anyhoo she was living in a house that was ruled by a house Mother and one of those rules were that all the doors were locked at 10pm and you couldn't leave or enter after that time unless it was a emergency. Also no boys were allowed in the house at 8pm.

Well the few days prior the girls had been hit by a frat house doing a panty raid. Several of the girls had underthings stolen and they were a little irked. Someone (and Mom denies it was her...I don't fully believe that) suggested a boxer run. So on a night of a game the girls broke into the frat house and each girl was supposed to steal a guys boxers. Mom was in one room doing just that when the resident of said room came in wearing only his boxers. Mom promptly stole him blushing and stuttering as she showed him off to the other ladies. She hinted at makeup getting applied.

However they didn't move fast enough and the House Mom was doing a check. The poor guy was shoved under a bed and hidden until the Mom left. But when she left the door was locked and already in trouble they set him up in a bed and when the door got unlocked at 6am, they snuck him back out.

[Jester]

ASpeaking of roommate pranks, Halloween is approaching, and Hubs (the closest thing I've ever had to a roommate) has a habit of rigging things to jump out at me when I come home. He's very good at rigging up cables and pulleys to the door, and I startle easily.

If you want to get revenge on him, here's how you do it:

Find someone else who is as adept as the hubster at rigging up such devices, or at least moderately competent. Make sure this person is (a) trustworthy to not speak about this to anyone else, and (b) not a close friend of the hubster's. Even better if they don't know each other. Hell, better yet, get some instruction from someone out of town that has no contact with your husband or anyone he knows. That way you can do all the rigging and run no risk of hubs finding out.

One day when hubs is out and about, but before he has started his prank season on you, rig up such a rigging to wherever he keeps his main supplies for this sort of thing, such as his ropes, pulleys, etc. Find something grislier than Weird Al, and rig it so this monstrously gruesome thing leaps out at him violently. Then sit back and wait for your revenge to unfold. Because eventually, that little internal timer of his will to off, telling him it's that time of year again where he gets to screw with Kitty's sanity. And when he thinks you're not around (or perhaps when you AREN'T around), he will head to that special door of his...and BAM! Tables turned.

Myself, I would add a nice little sign reading something along the lines of "It's my turn, bitch!" But I'm evil like that.


Oh, and don't ask me how to actually do any of this. I am technically and mechanically mostly incompetent. I'm just the Idea Man when it comes to revenge pranks.

[KellyHabersham]

Not something I directly did, but.....a few years back, my sister and her husband bought a gorilla suit, and took it up to our cabin in northern Arizona. Everyone would go for a walk at night, and "Rick" (sister's husband) would put on the suit, hide somewhere near the house, and jump out at people. It's since become kind of a tradition now anytime we visit the cabin, and it's especially fun to play this prank on anyone who's coming with us for the first time.

(I wasn't there for this particular trip, but apparently my cousin "Aaron" and his friends came up once, and these supposedly macho teenage boys were all freaked out)

[Tanasi]

I done a few dorm pranks and witnessed several others. Generally my pranks lean to the mean side as I'm usually trying to make a point. I had one room with two guys from lower Virginia that were real real country. They'd go out an get drunk 3 days a week come back to the dorm and fuss and fight with each other until they passed out usually around 3am. I got tired of this so while at home one weekend I went to the fireworks stand and bought a string of 10,000 blackcat fire-crackers. Their room was very spartan and didn't have carpet or much furniture so I waited until the next morning were they were good and hung over and shoved the fire-crackers under their door and lit the fuse. They banged away for 5 minutes. Someone in the next building called campus police and they arrived while it was going on. It was later explained to them the next time they fought the prank wouldn't be so nice.
One guy OCD to the core about keeping his room clean. He'd mop and dust every day and on weekends he'd wake up the RA on duty to get access to the mop. To say they didn't like being awaken to get a mop would be an understatement. So one night while he was sleeping someone took a 1 pound bag of flour and handful by handful threw it against his screen which the box fan in the window would suck the flour in and distribute it around the room. When he came out of his room the next morning the janitor nick-named him Casper. It took him days to finally clean all the flour up.
Another guy that was a inconsiderate and obnoxious roommate got "held" in his room and missed an important test. This guy had been bring friends and girls over at all hours disturbing his room-mate so the morning of the test the aggrevied room-mate took a condom and rolled it out and squirted some lotion in it and on it and put it on the door knob on the inside of the room. He then put a sign on the room for no one to open the door until after 11am. The bad room-mate woke up and couldn't get out the door because of what he thought was a used condom on the door and no one would answer his pounding on the door or calls. Oh the rooms didn't have phones then so he couldn't call for help.

[Deserted]

The bad room-mate woke up and couldn't get out the door because of what he thought was a used condom on the door and no one would answer his pounding on the door or calls.

Jesus christ, really? Was this guy an idiot? (No, don't answer that, I already know.)

I guarantee that had it been me, I wouldn't have let eventhe nastiest used condom stop me. Hands wash, and if it looks THAT bad, well, I have extra clothes.

[Jester]

Good lord. It would take me three minutes to get past that used condom on the doorknob.

Two minutes to look at it and go
5 seconds to find a towel.
5 seconds to use the towel to grab the condom off the doorknob, and pitch it in the trash.
15 seconds to wipe down the doorknob with the towel.
5 seconds to grab my bag.
2 seconds to open the damn door.
And 28 seconds to wash my hands in the bathroom.

Then off to take the test, and all day to plot my revenge.