I may get arrested for murder.

[Jester]

Mayhap you should inform Princess of the expiration date on your courtesy.

No. I told her at the time that a few days was fine, a few weeks was not. If she is the adult that she claims to be, I shouldn't have to walk her step by step through this. So...no.

I know you're just trying to be nice and give him some time to contact you, but he might be using that time to think up excuses for every question you might ask him.

He could have contacted me to set something up, and given himself enough time between the contact and the meeting to think up all those answers. Frankly, though, if he needs to think up "excuses," he is already not impressing me. I am going to be asking simple, honest, straightforward questions, and I would HOPE that I would get simple, honest, straightforward answers.

I was also thinking for this sit down all four of you should be there Mom, Princess, you, and Od. That way nothing is hidden from anyone.

Her Mom, Abbey, is in Houston. This is not realistic. I am, for lack of a better phrase, her chosen representative here in KW, at least as far as her daughter and this relationship goes. Abbey and I go way back, and she trusts me completely, as I adopted her two daughters as my nieces years ago, and Abbey knows I have nothing but their best interests in mind.

Mom is too far away right now, and Jester needs a meeting where Princess can't run interference for OD.

Besides, if Jester needs to threaten OD's life and/or testicles, it's better that Princess not witness it.

Not too far from the truth. I want to be able to just sit down and talk with the guy, without Princess objecting to anything I might ask or say, or make excuses for OD, or answer questions for him. Especially since there are some things that have come to light recently that I have some serious questions and/or reservations about, that speak directly to his nature.

This is, for lack of a better analogy, where the young man gets grilled by the overprotective father of the young man's date. I may not be her father, but she is the closest thing to a daughter I have (along with my other two nieces), and at the moment, I am the closest thing to a father she has, whether she realizes it or admits it.

I do think that a later meeting between Jester, Princess and OD might not be a bad idea, just so everyone can lay their cards on the table.

I wouldn't call a future get-together a "meeting." Maybe go out to dinner or some such. Or an execution. Depending.


UPDATE: I finally heard from Mr. Wonderful. And the way it went down does not reflect all that well on Princess. She got back to the apartment she (currently) shares with my friend Little Red, and was telling Red that she (Princess) was going to text me today about it...but when she found out Little Red was heading out to meet up with me for dinner, she sent the message along with Red that I could just contact OD directly.

I waited a week for this shit? REALLY? And then you are too fucking lazy to bother telling me yourself? Talk about wussing out.

In any case, I texted OD a message basically saying who I was (as if he didn't know), and that I wanted to have a talk with him. He said any day except Friday was good, which was fine with me, so I gave him an option of Saturday any time or Monday evening. (Sunday, I will be drinking, and this would not be a good idea....for anyone.) To his credit, he chose Saturday. So he and I are going to meet at a local watering hole that I often frequent.

What he doesn't know: I will not be alone. Although he does not know that now, and he will not know that at the time. I wanted someone he does not know to be there for two reasons. First, as a witness, in case he says something that I need someone else to hear, and also in case he later says I said something I did not say. Secondly, I want a second person's opinion on this guy. So, I am having my friend Cool Chick (who Princess knows, but Mr. Wonderful does not) meet me at the watering hole before my appointed rendezvous with OD, and he and I will be sitting at the table next to hers, so she can listen in while pretending to not listen in.

I should note that Cool Chick is very intelligent, and can be very impartial and level-headed, and if she thinks I am wrong or off base on something, including this, she will tell me flat out.

Is this a little underhanded? Absolutely. I'll be the first to admit it. And frankly, I have no problem with this. This is my niece I am talking about. As I said above, practically a daughter figure to me. So there is nothing I won't do when I am concerned for her. And this situation, as I have made clear, very much concerns me.

Also in my favor: home field advantage, in every way. First, I have lived here almost 11 years...he has not quite been here a year. Secondly, I frequent bars a lot, and he doesn't drink all that often. Finally, the local watering hole is one I frequent where they know me by name, and where they rather like me. I don't know if he's ever set foot in there.

While I am normally very mentally organized, I am considering writing down some of my questions and concerns in a notebook, just so I don't miss anything, since one of my friends pointed out something huge that I missed when I talked with Princess, that I really should have asked her. What do you think....will I come off as a weenie if I have notes with me? Or organized, prepared, and methodical?

[iradney]

Good to have an impartial party listening in. She might pick up things you may miss. And yes, having a witness is good too, that way OD can't claim that you threatened to bedazzle his privates if he lays a toenail on Princess.

[tollbaby]

Notes... you may come across as a bit of an overprotective weenie, but I think it's sweet

Good luck, and if you ever want to be MY over-protective uncle, feel free LOL (Could have used someone like you with the asshole from Indiana a few years ago).

[Squeaksmyalias]

Notes... you may come across as a bit of an overprotective weenie, but I think it's sweet

Yea...I 2nd that....sticky notes might work, then before he shows you pocket them.

You can be my awesome uncle Jester if you want.
I'm still dealing with an ex boyfriend getting my stuff back. He can bug me about everything else but I can't get my books back.

[Jester]

I'm still dealing with an ex boyfriend getting my stuff back. He can bug me about everything else but I can't get my books back.

Simple solution. Next time he calls to bug you about whatever:

"Sorry, you get no more of your shit back until I get my books. End. Of. Story." *click*

[BookstoreEscapee]

You can be my awesome uncle Jester if you want.
I'm still dealing with an ex boyfriend getting my stuff back.

Me too...maybe Uncle Jester can get my ex to pay up (he's in Florida, too!)

[Jester]

Me too...maybe Uncle Jester can get my ex to pay up (he's in Florida, too!)

Got an address? I LOVE road trips.....

[BookstoreEscapee]

Got an address? I LOVE road trips.....

Some little island off the gulf coast.

[Jester]

Some little island off the gulf coast.

That narrows it down....to a whole shit load of the Gulf Coast!

[BookstoreEscapee]

That narrows it down....to a whole shit load of the Gulf Coast!

boca grande (so maybe it's a big island...or a medium, if Starbucks made islands )

[persephone]

I'm a bit late to this, but good luck today, Jester. I hope, for Princess' sake, that this guy is up and up and sees something in her you might not, as you are her uncle and have known her since, you know, annoying stage.

I also hope that for his sake and you sake as I'm sure he wants to live and I'd hate for you to have to commit a crime!

[Jester]

boca grande (so maybe it's a big island...or a medium, if Starbucks made islands )

Not far from my favorite getaway, Fort Myers Beach. Hmmmm.....

I hope, for Princess' sake, that this guy is up and up and sees something in her you might not, as you are her uncle and have known her since, you know, annoying stage.

I hope he's on the up and up too.

And trust me, though I am her uncle, I understand what a guy would see in her. (Well, as much as an uncle can understand it.) It's not like this is her first boyfriend, or that I have any illusions that she is still an innocent little child. I don't. But she is 19, he is 41, and they are moving in together after only a few weeks of dating. These are things that concern me, along with a few other red flags.

[persephone]

But she is 19, he is 41, and they are moving in together after only a few weeks of dating. These are things that concern me, along with a few other red flags.

Oh I agree. Completely. Terrifies the hell out of me for her.

I'm just trying to think positive thoughts and hope that the situation ends or continues in a way that is good for everyone. Maybe if you explain the concerns, he'll come around on the moving in together part. Maybe he just isn't thinking about it from other people's perspective?

I, for one, can tell you that I fell in love with and knew I was going to marry my husband, literally, before I can remember. I always knew it, somewhere. My sister called me after her first date with her husband and told me she was going to marry him. She did and it worked out very well. It does happen.

But it still does frighten me for her. Good luck today. Keep us posted.

[Jester]

And how old were you and your sister?

I know, I know, it's not always about age. We all knew everything when we were 19. Lord knows I did. But there are some, very few, exceptional 19 year olds that could and would make this work. They are mature beyond their years. My niece, as exceptional as she is in so many ways, is NOT one of these people. When it comes to non-emotional things, like school, work, and paying bills and such, she has maturity beyond most people her age. Matters of the heart? No. No. And definitively, no. I base this both upon her past relationships and the disturbing way she is (not) dealing with her father's death last summer.

The amusing thing is, while she downplayed the theoretical scenario I brought up in our little chat, I know without question if I started dating one of her 19 year old friends, she would be in the forefront of people saying "What the FUCK are you thinking, dude?"

Meh. I suppose I should get in the shower, since I'm meeting Mr. Wondeful in less than an hour.

[jedimaster91]

Can't wait for the show!