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  • Takes the cake? She takes the whole damn bakery!

    This woman, this allegedly professional chef, does not know that you're supposed to cook salmon skin-side down? First-day culinary students know that! This is basic cooking technique, and she doesn't know it, and she sits there and arrogantly says she's the best one in the competition and that she should be the head chef at a major NYC restaurant?

    I wouldn't hire her as a PREP cook!

    "The Customer Is Always Right...But The Bartender Decides Who Is
    Still A Customer."

    Comment


    • Yeah I was screaming at the TV too when they let Jennifer go.

      Hubby can vouch for me that I did say "Damn I hope the sex was worth it."

      But from the teasers, I don't think she makes it to the final 2. Looks like Will and Paul to me.
      Last edited by Kanalah; 09-13-2011, 02:53 PM.
      https://purplefish-quilting.square.site/

      Comment


      • Definitely Will and Paul. Tommie has no chance. Elise is not a leader.

        Quoth Eisa View Post
        she is such an awful person, i wish i could duct-tape her mouth shut!
        I wish I could duct tape something else shut, lest she breed. But then again, with her she probably would manage it by mitosis.

        Quoth Jester View Post
        Then again, I have to fault the entire group. All five chefs that were in the final five, as a group, were remarkably unimpressive. As one of the diners remarked, don't you think the final five would have had the dinners out a bit sooner? This is the worst final five I have seen in my limited viewing of the show.
        Definitely the worst group. I've been watching regularly since season 3. The producers clearly picked based on personality rather than talent.

        Will and Paul are probably fine chefs. But it won't be much of a victory for who ever wins based on the lack luster competition.
        They say that God only gives us what we can handle. Apparently, God thinks I'm a bad ass.

        Comment


        • Honestly, as far as these Top 3; I'm voting for Tommy because he's the only one who was honest. I'm frankly shocked Ramsey didn't tear a strip off them for the blatant end game posturing they were doing.

          Hell, Jennifer's dish damn near won the challenge, and it was by doing something OTHER than what the other three were doing. Elise *shudder*.

          And I agree. Marcel was a model contestant compared to Elise. Talk about a horrible contestant; and frankly she isn't even that good TV watching either. She doesn't make Drah-ma. She just shouts a lot and can't boil water with a stove and a pot of hot water. Oh and she shouts a lot more.

          Comment


          • I've watched the show from the get go, and yeah, Elise is definately ranking in as the top bitch harpy I've ever seen on the show. I'm pretty sure this is why Gordon snaps at the drop of a hat on the show now. Its because the producers give him contestants that are half cooks and half "personalities".

            Honestly I enjoy Masterchef more now, because A) Gordon isn't drivento the edge of insanity every episode and B) More actual cooking is taking place. Though Masterchef still has the ridiculous amount of editing for drama and stupid sound effects. Included that patented Hell's Kitchen "You dun fucked up now" Noise of Failure that sounds like a dying goose. You know the one. Whenever something "Bad" happens on Hells Kitchen, there's that whining noise of dissappointment. To let the viewer know something Bad has occurred. Because Americans are apparently incapable of picking up on any sort of social, verbal or emotional cues now. >.>

            I'm getting extremely sick of the pysch out shit though. Here's a tip, Fox: When you pull the "Haha just kidding, you're not really losing the challenge/being eliminated even though I picked you first to make it look like you were" every fucking time in every fucking reality show you produce it sort of loses the effect.

            Same with the "Every challenge magically comes down to a tiebreaker" bullshit.

            Oh, and Marcel was just an arrogant douchebag. Annoying but relatively harmless and no where near as delusional as Elise. Also, Marcel could actually cook.

            Comment


            • Quoth Panacea View Post
              I wish I could duct tape something else shut, lest she breed. But then again, with her she probably would manage it by mitosis.
              To borrow a line from George Carlin, I wouldn't fuck her with a stolen dick.

              Quoth Panacea View Post
              The producers clearly picked based on personality rather than talent.
              They are producing a television show, and as such, they do have to pick cooks that have personalities. Otherwise you end up with people like Justin B. from the last Next Food Network Star. Who, while a fine chef, was about as exciting to watch as a julienned carrot.

              Quoth Jetfire View Post
              Hell, Jennifer's dish damn near won the challenge, and it was by doing something OTHER than what the other three were doing. Elise *shudder*.
              Anyone else as amused as I was by Elise's performance in that challenge? Not only did she talk her arrogant ass off, but she came in dead last. And it wasn't even close.

              Amusingly, while the choice of salmon with mac and cheese did seem odd, there have been many chefs on such shows who could have made it work, and made the judges eat their damning words. Richard Blaise, anyone? Stephanie Izard? (I still drool over her, but that's besides the point.) Carla What'shername? (The tall, perky, goofy, Miss Comfort Food woman from Top Chef All Stars.) And on and on. The point is that a good chef can make a dish that makes you initially scratch your head and then realize that their madness made sense.

              Of course, Elise doesn't possess that kind of talent. Hell, she is not talented or worthy enough to do mis en place for those people!

              Quoth Jetfire View Post
              Marcel was a model contestant compared to Elise.
              Marcel thinks Elise is a douche.
              Christian from Master Chef thinks she's arrogant.
              Penny from NFNS thinks she's not a team player.

              Quoth Gravekeeper View Post
              Its because the producers give him contestants that are half cooks and half "personalities".

              Though Masterchef still has the ridiculous amount of editing for drama and stupid sound effects.
              Again, the producers are producing a show. And they are trying to appeal to more than just the core demographic of foodies. And based upon the ratings, I hate to say they seem to know what they are doing. Or did, until this season. This is just ridiculous.

              Quoth Gravekeeper View Post
              Because Americans are apparently incapable of picking up on any sort of social, verbal or emotional cues now.
              This is something new?

              Quoth Gravekeeper View Post
              Oh, and Marcel was just an arrogant douchebag. Annoying but relatively harmless and no where near as delusional as Elise. Also, Marcel could actually cook.
              And that is the difference between a lot of the "villains" on other cooking competition shows and Elise: most of the ones we hated the most actually had the talent to back up their bravado, arrogance, big talk, and pettiness. Marcel could cook. Christian, arrogant as he was, could really cook. The man was a master with seafood. Penny? As I've said previously, I wouldn't want to work with her, or even hang out with her....but her food looked delicious.

              And there is some truth to the idea that it's not arrogant if you can back it up.

              Elise is arrogant. Hell, she's the most arrogant one I've seen yet. Sadly, she can't back it up.

              My head chef, while he might not be able to get far on some of those shows, could run circles around her. Hell, he has pedigree...he was trained by an Iron Chef. (No, really.) Also, he would not stand her bullshit. She would not survive till her first paycheck before he threw out of his kitchen, and out of the bar, for good. Because no matter how talented you are (and she's not), it doesn't matter. You can talk all you want, but in the end, two words will trump all the shit you spew from your mouth:

              "You're fired."

              "The Customer Is Always Right...But The Bartender Decides Who Is
              Still A Customer."

              Comment


              • This is why I've mostly switched to watching MasterChef Australia. No egos (other than the normal variety), no blow-ups, no keeping someone around just for ratings. It's great.

                Masterchef US is ok, but not great. I enjoyed this season, but stopped watching after Ben Starr left. He may not have been the best cook, but he was fun to watch and he wasn't a dick. I liked that.

                I am PISSED that Jennifer got kicked off this week. Gordon should have pulled either Elise or Tommy: it's obvious neither one of them can cut it. I find myself missing Dave from season whatever-it-was more and more: the dude cooked most of the season with a frakkin' broken arm and didn't complain. These newer cooks are such whiners!

                my money's on Will to win. Paul is good, but not reliable. Will's been pretty damn solid.
                "Eventually, everything that you have said becomes everything you will ever say." Eireann

                My pony dolls: http://equestriarags.tumblr.com

                Comment


                • Quoth JoitheArtist View Post
                  Masterchef US is ok, but not great. I enjoyed this season, but stopped watching after Ben Starr left. He may not have been the best cook, but he was fun to watch and he wasn't a dick. I liked that.
                  Yeah, Ben was cool. Goofy, too...which naturally made me a fan. Probably my favorite of the finalists was Christine, because she was so gritty and at times surprisingly good...surprising to her competitors as well as herself. Max was my least favorite....I hated that fucker immediately. Had he lasted longer, he would have given Christian a run for his money in the ego department. The difference being, of course, that Christian was a far better cook than Max.

                  I did like Jen, who won, as she was just so determined, and only got bitchy (for the most part) when attacked by the likes of Christian. Watching her beat him out repeatedly was awesome, though that made her beating the usually likeable Adrien in the finale somehow a bit less spectacular....though watching Christian watch her win was really classic.

                  But as for Ben being a non-dick, that is why I liked Stephanie Izard from Top Chef. Well, the fact that she was nice, didn't play the drama games, could flat out cook, and that she was one smokin' hot babe. (And yes, if anyone here actually knows her, I would love an intro!)

                  Speaking of Top Chef, anyone know when the next season starts?

                  "The Customer Is Always Right...But The Bartender Decides Who Is
                  Still A Customer."

                  Comment


                  • Quoth JoitheArtist View Post
                    This is why I've mostly switched to watching MasterChef Australia. No egos (other than the normal variety), no blow-ups, no keeping someone around just for ratings. It's great.

                    <snippity snip snip snip>

                    my money's on Will to win. Paul is good, but not reliable. Will's been pretty damn solid.
                    Masterchef Australia airs in the US now?

                    My money's on either one. I'm guessing that they'll do a double elimination next episode and then go straight to the finale from there.

                    All I'll say is that Paul has grown.
                    The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

                    Now queen of USSR-Land...

                    Comment


                    • Quoth fireheart View Post
                      Masterchef Australia airs in the US now?
                      No, it's on YouTube. I am SO ADDICTED. Not even funny.

                      Another thing I like about Ben Starr: he interacts with the fanbase he created. He's very accessible on Twitter. I like that.
                      "Eventually, everything that you have said becomes everything you will ever say." Eireann

                      My pony dolls: http://equestriarags.tumblr.com

                      Comment


                      • Quoth JoitheArtist View Post
                        Another thing I like about Ben Starr: he interacts with the fanbase he created. He's very accessible on Twitter. I like that.
                        The sign of a real star is someone who treats their fans like people, rather than a commodity.

                        Which is part of the reason I am a fan of Sandra Bullock, Cheech Marin, Penn & Teller, and Clarence Clemons, and would have no problem watching Toby Keith or Vanessa Williams die in a fire. (Yes, I've interacted with all of them at some point.)

                        "The Customer Is Always Right...But The Bartender Decides Who Is
                        Still A Customer."

                        Comment


                        • Quoth JoitheArtist View Post
                          No, it's on YouTube. I am SO ADDICTED. Not even funny.
                          That's how I used to watch Hell's Kitchen up until recently. (the person who was posting the Hell's Kitchen eps was caught and banned-he actually did a good job too, didn't leave out promos or anything like that)

                          and yes, it does have its moments. They've done a Kids Masterchef as well and they're doing another season of that this year. (the major differences are that the challenges are more or less adapted for the kids and they get eliminated in groups rather than one at a time-also ALL of them get participation prizes)
                          The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

                          Now queen of USSR-Land...

                          Comment


                          • Quoth fireheart View Post
                            That's how I used to watch Hell's Kitchen up until recently. (the person who was posting the Hell's Kitchen eps was caught and banned-he actually did a good job too, didn't leave out promos or anything like that)
                            <cough> he's back actually on a different channel.....

                            I was thinking of giving Masterchef Australia a whirl. But me and Australia have a long, bizzarre history together. I must be careful. ;p

                            Oh, and Ben Starr was awesome.

                            Comment


                            • Quoth Gravekeeper View Post
                              <cough> he's back actually on a different channel.....

                              I was thinking of giving Masterchef Australia a whirl. But me and Australia have a long, bizzarre history together. I must be careful. ;p

                              .
                              May I ask what this bizarre history entails?
                              The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

                              Now queen of USSR-Land...

                              Comment


                              • Quoth fireheart View Post
                                May I ask what this bizarre history entails?
                                Yeah. Don't leave us hangin'
                                They say that God only gives us what we can handle. Apparently, God thinks I'm a bad ass.

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