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When the manger asks how I keep the aisles so neat and organized, I am not to reply with, "Crop dusting."
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Don't waste time trying to convince someone that the sky is blue. -
When offering cashews, I'm not allowed to say, "Wouldn't you like to have my nuts in your mouth?"This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."
I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.Comment
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Must...Not...Laugh
Laughing hurts...Comment
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IF that term has the MEANING I believe it doesQuoth TheWolfEmperor View Post
(I know the term and a meaning from serving/waiting tables)
I'm lost without a paddle and headed up SH*T creek.
-- Life Sucks Then You Die.
"I'll believe corp. are people when Texas executes one."Comment
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I first heard the term on Rifftrax.Quoth Racket_Man View PostIF that term has the MEANING I believe it does (I know the term and a meaning from serving/waiting tables)Don't waste time trying to convince someone that the sky is blue.Comment
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The problem with crop dusting is that some times you end up fertilizing on accident.Quoth TheWolfEmperor View Post
Just sliding down the razor blade of life.
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Sometimes Ol Estra needs more straw.Quoth drunkenwildmage View PostThe problem with crop dusting is that some times you end up fertilizing on accident.
I am not an a**hole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate a**holes!
Procrastination: Forward planning to insure there is something to do tomorrow.
Derails threads faster than a pocket nuke.Comment
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I'm not allowed to microwave popcorn for 23 minutes.This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."
I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.Comment
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i have seen it catch flame at 4min, so i agree with that directive.Quoth catcul View PostThis is a drama-free zone; violators will be slapped. -Irving Patrick Freleigh
my blog:http://steeledragon.wordpress.com/Comment
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"It is traditional when asking for help or advice to listen to the answers you receive" - RealUnimportant
Rev that Engine Louder, I Can't Hear How Small Your Dick Is - Jay 2K Winger
The Darwin Awards The best site to visit to restore your faith in instant karma.Comment
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He realized he accidentally added an extra zero before he started up the microwave.Quoth greek_jester View Post How is there a building left standing?!?
This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."
I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.Comment
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When asked to tape signs to the tills explaining why they were running a bit slow (old and too many ppl) I am not allowed to phrase it like this:
As our till are older they are becoming harder to run. We our currently keeping are system up with a mix of human sacrifice and black magic. Please remember there is a reason our complaints are low at this location.
Back to school shoppers suck"It's a joke not a dick. No need to take it so hard."
“Here’s $10, go to Walmart and buy a houseplant. Carry it around to make up for all of that oxygen you waste.”Comment
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Lucky him - I had a student who once set off the smoke alarm because they misread the instructions on a packet of croissants, thought "oven" meant "Microwave oven" and put it in for 4 minutes.Quoth catcul View PostHe realized he accidentally added an extra zero before he started up the microwave.
Yeah...fire department and alarm company were NOT happy about that one.
And one to add from me:
- I am not allowed to chain my new manager to his desk because he ACTUALLY HAS A FSKING SPINE!
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After being asked about going to a local chicken restaurant, I'm not allowed to say, "I just wanted two big, meaty breasts in my mouth."This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."
I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.Comment
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That's alright, the bubble tea place I go to has named their drinks sometimes very suggestive things. I'm often in there for a sexy redhead or a warm man nut. I have no problem telling it out when I walk through the door as I've been there so often that they know me by now.Quoth catcul View Post"It's a joke not a dick. No need to take it so hard."
“Here’s $10, go to Walmart and buy a houseplant. Carry it around to make up for all of that oxygen you waste.”Comment
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