Things I am not allowed to do at work.

[TheWolfEmperor]

When the manger asks how I keep the aisles so neat and organized, I am not to reply with, "Crop dusting."

[catcul]

When offering cashews, I'm not allowed to say, "Wouldn't you like to have my nuts in your mouth?"

[Kazim]

Must...Not...Laugh
Laughing hurts...

[Racket_Man]

When the manger asks how I keep the aisles so neat and organized, I am not to reply with, "Crop dusting."

IF that term has the MEANING I believe it does (I know the term and a meaning from serving/waiting tables)

[TheWolfEmperor]

IF that term has the MEANING I believe it does (I know the term and a meaning from serving/waiting tables)

I first heard the term on Rifftrax.

[drunkenwildmage]

I first heard the term on Rifftrax.

The problem with crop dusting is that some times you end up fertilizing on accident.

[dalesys]

The problem with crop dusting is that some times you end up fertilizing on accident.

Sometimes Ol Estra needs more straw.

[catcul]

I'm not allowed to microwave popcorn for 23 minutes.

[SteeleDragon78]

I'm not allowed to microwave popcorn for 23 minutes.

i have seen it catch flame at 4min, so i agree with that directive.

[greek_jester]

I'm not allowed to microwave popcorn for 23 minutes.

How is there a building left standing?!?

[catcul]

How is there a building left standing?!?

He realized he accidentally added an extra zero before he started up the microwave.

[AkaiKitsune]

When asked to tape signs to the tills explaining why they were running a bit slow (old and too many ppl) I am not allowed to phrase it like this:

As our till are older they are becoming harder to run. We our currently keeping are system up with a mix of human sacrifice and black magic. Please remember there is a reason our complaints are low at this location.

Back to school shoppers suck

[LadyofArc]

He realized he accidentally added an extra zero before he started up the microwave.

Lucky him - I had a student who once set off the smoke alarm because they misread the instructions on a packet of croissants, thought "oven" meant "Microwave oven" and put it in for 4 minutes.

Yeah...fire department and alarm company were NOT happy about that one.

And one to add from me:

- I am not allowed to chain my new manager to his desk because he ACTUALLY HAS A FSKING SPINE!

[catcul]

After being asked about going to a local chicken restaurant, I'm not allowed to say, "I just wanted two big, meaty breasts in my mouth."

[AkaiKitsune]

After being asked about going to a local chicken restaurant, I'm not allowed to say, "I just wanted two big, meaty breasts in my mouth."

That's alright, the bubble tea place I go to has named their drinks sometimes very suggestive things. I'm often in there for a sexy redhead or a warm man nut. I have no problem telling it out when I walk through the door as I've been there so often that they know me by now.