Things I am not allowed to do at work.

[cinema guy]

We're no longer allowed to eat where customers might see us. Apparently seeing a retail drone eating reminds SCs that we are human and they get offended.

That is true of the cinema, too.

[edible_hat]

I'm not allowed to use the high-pressure hose from the car wash to take pot-shots at passing pigeons and seagulls.

[HavingAWonderfulTime]

I am not supposed to make 24" (60cm) long viking ships out of cups, napkins, straws, and hot sleeves.

[Dark-Star]

I am never EVER to substitute decaf coffee in the office coffeemaker.

[PossJB]

I am not allowed to make a large bonfire of our backstock in the parking lot so we can "start over" with a clean stock room.

[draftermatt]

I am not allowed to gently remind a customer that he is not our only customer. So when one person cancels it affects everyone.

[Difdi]

Not allowed to answer the phone unless I'm the only one there...

...ever since the time I told an SC exactly what he could do with the rototiller he wanted to return to us, but had not rented from us (we don't rent equipment out), and very abusively would not take no for an answer.

[daleduke17]

I am not allowed to make a large bonfire of our backstock in the parking lot so we can "start over" with a clean stock room.

Hmm....sounds like a problem I had to deal with at my old place of work. I wanted to do that when I was in inventory since our counts were so screwed up. Burn it all, set everything to zero, start over.

[AKWalMartCartGuy]

when talking with 2 managers i'm not allowed to ask one if they're playing good manager-bad manager or if they're just a bitch(no, I haven't done that)

[Trayol]

I'm not allowed to direct patrons to the Baskin Robbins half a mile away. Though often tempted, I've never done it.

[Madhatter_67_85]

The staff is not allowed to bet on any knife fights that break out among kitchen staff (this actually happened quite a bit believe it or not). For some reason managers would get irate when servers would all gather around to watch and start placing bets down.

The staff is not allowed to drink on the job. (At the book store we would wait until the GM left and then we would sit in the back and drink all night.) We would even be kind enough to take a drink up to the person stuck on the register upon request.

We, the bartenders, are not allowed to give out free shots in exchange for womens bras and/or g-strings. Our storage closet behind the bar was full of them

We are not allowed to take books people are not going to buy and pile them in the parking lot and make a bon fire.

We are not allowed to have cart races around the dining room floor before the restaurant opens. Also cannot use the carts for jousting competitions.

We are not allowed to lock fellow coworkers in the walk-in freezer because they are pissing everyone off.

We are not allowed to cover the GMs car in books (because he is being an asshat that day).

We are not allowed to demand payment from customers for having to look through their roach infested boxes of books covered in dust because they think they are old and must be worth a fortune. Also not allowed to throw said books into trash directly in front of customer.

Not allowed to charge known bad tippers an extra $1-2 dollars per drink and then go back and change it to regular prices after they left, pocketing the difference as the tip those cheap asses should have left us.

Not allowed to ignore cheap asses in hopes they will get the hint, leave and let a potential good customer put their butt on that bar stool.

[edible_hat]

Sadly, I'm no longer allowed to impersonate Yoda.

[Sharsarannon]

(From the Studio here at The Castle {my home})

I may not stand on two Swiffer wipes and skate about to mop the wooden floor of the downstairs area.
No matter how much fun it is.
Or how great the workout is.

I may not burn sage to cleanse the air.
Not even if a housemate has burned soup and smelled the whole kitchen up.

I may not sing medieval hunting/feasting songs while in the public areas of the Castle.
Especially not The Keeper and the Doe, or The Holly She Bears a Berry.
Not even if I love those songs, and they're stuck in my head.

[Polenicus]

I am no longer allowed to...

... Slap the 4 'D' cell maglite in my hand and cackle 'Right! Guards aren't allowed weapons on the site! No weapons here! Muahahahahahaha!'
... Especially in earshot of the Site Supervisor...
... Even if he thinks it's funny.

... Makes bets on when the Mobile vehicle will get trashed, and how
... Or on how long it will take for it to get fixed when it does
... Even though I was dead on last time

... Plot jokes to play on the Site Supervisor, like photoshopping the Continuing Education Building exploding, and sending it to his cellphone
... Or hanging a set of 'Truck Nutz' from the seat of his bike
... Even though it'd be hilarious

[lordlundar]

... Even though I was dead on last time

I think that might be why you're not allowed to make bets anymore. The Sup got jealous!