Workday Phrases of Lore and Legend

[scroob]

you sound like a dead cat

looks more like an old man with hemmorhoids to me

[Becks]

"I'm so glad she got a haircut. She doesn't look fat anymore."

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"Oooooooooooh, look!!! A potato sack. From Iiiiiiiiiiiidaaaaaaaaaaaahoooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!"

[KhirasHY]

"I can get a beer, but I can't pay rent."
"Well, that's what's important."

"What is that?"
"It's an orange."
"........."
"What!?"
"Did you cut a face into it with lipstick on it?"
"It's been a slow '08! Want one?"

[anniesbar]

Lady -- Um, your employee outside just made me wet!

[KhirasHY]

"Can you hold the balls, I can't balance everything here."

[draftermatt]

"Well to the ****'s threatening to fire someone is like eating Cheerios for breakfast"

[crazylegs]

How's he doing?]
Oh, he's a vegtable
So his IQs gone up then.

[edible_hat]

Never mind, with my ninja cleaning skills...
...you'll have that ninja clean in no time?

[crazylegs]

"Warning! Armed Turtles!"

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"He's into dwarves and grannies!"

[Rapscallion]

"Yeah, I went in search of rakes and instead had a Chinese massage. After that I watched The Dark Knight. I love my life."

Rapscallion

[crazylegs]

I'm all sweaty in the gusset.

[Dreamstalker]

"So now if I start having nightmares about origami I know whose fault it is."

[scroob]

that shirt makes you look like you weigh 3,000 pounds

[Spiffy McMoron]

"Hey, you can get bung at the Chinese supermarket!"
"I wonder if it tastes like hotdogs?"

[Becks]

"...and the doctor said I need to get a circumcision."