Dear....

[Shpepper]

Dear RP,

You may most certainly have my rain. But I honestly don't want the heat in return. I have been where you live in the spring and summer. Just some sunshine so I can put things outside my storage as I sort them.


Meow

[RootedPhoenix]

Dear Shpepper,

Ummm... *ponders* .....we'll send you the sunshine, and my friend in New York can have the heat. We'll all be happy.

--RP (who wishes this sort of thing were really possible. I love rain. )

[Lace Neil Singer]

Dear spiders,

I wuv you. Really I do. Just please stay out of my bathtub; I find it very annoying to have to remove you and your kind from the tub before I can run my bath. How about you go and catch flies or something instead of venturing into a place from where you can not escape without my help?

From Lace.

[Shpepper]

Dear Shpepper,

Ummm... *ponders* .....we'll send you the sunshine, and my friend in New York can have the heat. We'll all be happy.

--RP (who wishes this sort of thing were really possible. I love rain. )

Dear RP,

Sounds just luverly. Do you think you could include an In-N-Out Double Double with double cheese and extra grilled onions, an order of fried and a chocolate shake with the sunshine? I am so craving that right now and have not had it for 15 years.

Meow
Pepper (It would be wonderful)

[The_Dane]

Dear F,

Back in Vejle, you were my friend, my compatriot, and my only ally. But you know what?

Fuck you. Just because you're a visitor, does not give you the rights to say all that you have said. Off color remarks when my wife's not present are one thing(though I hate those, too), but to say such things blatently in her presence? You're an asshole. There are ways to approach the subject, but what you did isn't one of them. Asking my wife if "things" are not used while making rude hand gestures? What the fuck?

But to answer your question, or rather bragging that you and your wife make the beast with two backs six times a week? Twice a day, and that's with my brain tumor, her paralysis, and her relatives coming in and out of our tiny apartment all day.

So please, go back to Vejle. Your attitude isn't welcome.

DIAF,
Me

------

Dear Banshee Harpy Bitches,

At first, I thought it was just you, but apparently something must be in the goddamn water. Still not forgiving you, though.

Your nonexistant son/brother

-----

Dear Goldaries,

Thank you for putting up with all the idiots in my past. That being said, put the gun back in your purse, they're gone.

Love,
Your husband/pussywhipped slave

[crazylegs]

Dear S

Is it so hard to think you're not the centre of the known universe for perhaps just one moment?

No?

Oh well. Have fun!

No Love

Crazylegs

[monolayth]

Dear universe,

It needs to be made that you cannot get sick while pregnant. It is not fair.

meh!,
Monolayth

Dear Body,

Quit with this sickness. It is not cool to have an upper respatory infections. You have asthma and are pregnant. Totally not cool. And the stomach pains you were having earlier totally freaked me out. Am glad the dr told me that it was because i have been coughing so much.

Oh and the contant feeling like i have to trow up can go too.

nausiated,
monolayth

[RootedPhoenix]

Dear RP,

Sounds just luverly. Do you think you could include an In-N-Out Double Double with double cheese and extra grilled onions, an order of fried and a chocolate shake with the sunshine? I am so craving that right now and have not had it for 15 years.

Meow
Pepper (It would be wonderful)

Shpepper,

I can do that! *sends*

--RP

monolayth,

Boo on sickness. Boo I say. *offers 7up and crackers* I agree that being pregnant should be quite enough. Bleh. *offers gentle hugs also*

--RP

[Shpepper]

Dear RP,

*opens package, takes a bite....... swoons* HEAVEN ! ! ! !

needing to travel south desperately,

Meow

[SengaKitty]

Dear The_Dane and Goldenaries,
Ya'll rock And go The_Dane for sticking up for your wifey

Much love,
RHPG

----------------

Dear Sir,
I'm sorry you're sick, and you're so far away I can't take care of you I worry a lot, but you worried me more when you said you were coughing up blood. At least you went to the wellness center like I told you to. Thank you for doing that, I have no way to get to Maryland to kick your butt for not taking care of yourself. Only 36 more days til summer break! WOOOOO!

I love you with all my heart, and miss you and am counting the days and hours and minutes til I can see you again, and I hope to have a bed in the house this week

Your faerie

[goldaries13]

<snip>

Dear Goldaries,

Thank you for putting up with all the idiots in my past. That being said, put the gun back in your purse, they're gone.

Love,
Your husband/pussywhipped slave

Dear Dane,

Honestly, who cares about those idiots? That being said, any future offspring are never to be left with them unsupervised. They may end up doing some weird baby switch thing.

Love,
Me

---

Dear RHPG,

Us? Awesome? Surely you jest. We're just an ordinary couple with a taste for the bizarre.

GoldAries

---

Dear Mummy,

Please find a hobby while you're here. It's really cramping my sex life to having you over all the time. I mean, the walls are paper thin and it's just really weird, okay? There's only so many times The Dane can use the excuse he's checking for skin ulcers.

Lots of love anyway,
Me

[smileyeagle1021]

Dear J,
Why must you live in Texas and I live in Utah. I think I've fallen for you. Scratch that, I know I've fallen for you. I wish I knew whether or not you felt the same way. Maybe I don't, that might make the distance even more painful. I know you've mentioned before that you wanted to get out of Texas and that you liked the snow. I know exactly where you can find plenty of snow and where, come august, there will be an open room. If you are even half the person I think you are, I would gladly make any sacrifice for you.

Smiley

Dear Irony,
you do enjoy tormenting me don't you. 2.1 million people living within an hour of me, so of course it only makes sense that you'd make me start to fall for someone over 1000 miles away.
not greatly amused
Smiley

[RootedPhoenix]

Dear back,

You stink. It was just potting soil.

Dear life,

That thing that happened today? I really would have liked it if that did not happen to her. Also, OW. It hurt ME too. But it hurt her more. Grrr.

Dear painkillers,

I hope you rock. Infact, I hope your rocking-ness covers up the fact that my back IS SO VERY UNAWESOME.

Thank you for existing.

--RP

[iradney]

Dear body

Enough with the broodiness. Cut it out.

Rads

[CaroPhoenix]

Dear Mother Rum,

My daughter is NOT fat! How dare you tell me that! She's in the 95th precentile+ for height and weight. She is height & weight proportionate!

You want to see fat? Look at Sister Rum when she just a few years older than Child Rum. And how about you? I know I can find fat pictures of you when you were a child.

Stop it. One day you're telling me I'm not feeding her enough and now she's FAT!?

Grrrr,
Your Daughter
-------------------------------------------
Dear Mr. Rum,

I'm thisclose to forbidding D&D games at our house. Start behaving and helping out with the cleaning of the table.

Grrr to you too,
Your Wife