Workday Phrases of Lore and Legend

[Ghel]

“Explain to my sister how CDs work.”

Another day:
”Want me to rub it for you? My mom used to call me into her room to have me rub hers. At midnight.”

[Ghel]

“As a banker, if somebody says they’re going to declare bankruptcy, kill them.”

next day, someone else:

”I used to lie a lot when I was younger, not gonna lie.”

[catcul]

"Excuse me. I need to stab myself in the stomach."

[Ghel]

“Now my boobs are wet because I sneezed on my shirt.”

[catcul]

"We have four seasons: summer, fall, winter, and surprise."

[catcul]

"Hi, do you know Odie Garfield?"

[Dreamstalker]

"It's a good day at work when you come home with someone's nuts in your pocket."

[catcul]

"Hang up! My life depends on it."

[Nunavut Pants]

"New Myers-Briggs personality type: NMFP."

How about your Meyers-Briggs-Stratton personality type?

IJTsM: Intuitive, Judging, Two-Stroke, Mowing.

[Dreamstalker]

"Should we safeword this?"

[Dreamstalker]

"New Myers-Briggs personality type: NMFP."
"NMFP?"
"Not My F$cking Problem."

[Dreamstalker]

"This is a day where you just wanna crawl in a box and hide?"

[workerbee222]

"What's all over your car?"
"Vermont."

[drunkenwildmage]

"We are the 'Ex-Lax' of the company, we keep shit moving"

[drunkenwildmage]

'It smells like a combo of feet, ass and Parmesan cheese'