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Workday Phrases of Lore and Legend
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"I don't actually have a job of my own to do here. I do everyone else's job for them."
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"I just got something that wasn't supposed to be in my nose, in my nose!"
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"I'm getting better at giving blow jobs!"
I traded one gang of sewer-minded gutter trash for another, and I love it.
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"We used to drink this stuff called Steinhouse. 2 cases for $5. We kept it in the fridge at 32 degrees. If you slammed the first 2, it wasn't too bad."
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"A power pose is the only acceptable way to eat a 3 Musketeers bar."
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"We finally found Ted's big black vibrator."
"Oh, is that what was making all that noise?"
"Yep."
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"I took your advice from a few months ago."
"You did? What's wrong with you?"
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"If you're the one scanning your shit [at SCO] you waive any right to complain about the cashier."
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"If you send an email, please IM him to tell him you sent it so he can look for it."
"He might want to give him a call, too. Also, he should send his message by carrier pigeon."
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