Things I am not allowed to do at work.

[AkaiKitsune]

When putting in my 2 weeks notice, I must not attach the YT song "I've no more fucks to give" under the "reason for leaving employment" tab. Even if it says absolutely everything about how I feel about this job.

The fact ghat hey have enough ppl quit to warrent an online form for it says a lot.

[catcul]

If I bring a game called "Cockroach Poker" to work, I'm not allowed to say that we have roaches, stinkbugs, or rats in the office. I'm no longer allowed to bring cockroaches to work.

[catcul]

If my boss's boss uses a meeting request to inform us about her dentist appointment, I'm not allowed to click on "Propose New Time."

[dalesys]

If I'm requesting batteries for work, I'm not allowed to tell the male clerk, "I want the D."

... or the decel, cuz eveready's rabbiting on...

[catcul]

If I'm requesting batteries for work, I'm not allowed to tell the male clerk, "I want the D."

[Jay 2K Winger]

but we can't play anything by Rage Against the Machine.

"F**K YOU, I won't do what you tell me!"

[catcul]

ZZTop's "Pearl Necklace" is ok to play in the bank lobby, but we can't play anything by Rage Against the Machine.

To be fair, Zack de la Rocha has a potty mouth.

[Ghel]

ZZTop's "Pearl Necklace" is ok to play in the bank lobby, but we can't play anything by Rage Against the Machine.

[Ghel]

I'm to avoid describing character deaths at work, especially ones involving infected toes that the customer refused to have removed and slowly poisoned him. I need to remember that some of my coworkers are squeamish.

[catcul]

When cleaning the office, I should ask, "May I vacuum your chair?" not, "Can I suck off your seat?"

[Dreamstalker]

I can't play my "Robots Activate!" ringtone over the PA right at opening. At least not if C is around, everyone else thinks it's awesome.

Not allowed to make foam horns/a Viking longship head to put on the front of my cart.

[dalesys]

Claiming Havana Syndrome probably isn't going to get me out of work.

That wouldn't be diplomatic.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Claiming Havana Syndrome probably isn't going to get me out of work.

[Dreamstalker]

I'd say the googly eyes really are more professional than him.

[Ironclad Alibi]

Putting googly eyes on the back of my shirt/a hi-vis vest is apparently unprofessional..whatever 'professional' means around here.

"Professional" means the boss thought of it.

"Unprofessional" means the boss did not think of it.