How Not to Get Hired 101

[Seanette]

This would be for a driver position. Also, he called back yesterday to follow up with the GM, and to ask for her personal # to keep following up without tying up the store lines.

I really hope they're not so desperate as to hire this guy! Lousy attitude, no sense of boundaries (hint: asking someone who isn't even your boss yet for PERSONAL contact info to follow up on BUSINESS matters is over the line)....

[Parrothead]

This would be for a driver position. Also, he called back yesterday to follow up with the GM, and to ask for her personal # to keep following up without tying up the store lines.

[Racket_Man]

New manager interviewed a driver recently.

20 years old, never worked before (I can give that one a pass)
Had to step out to call his dad to text him his Social Security number
Thought the job would be "easy" (Ha haha hahaha hahahahano)
Came in with an "I don't give a fuck, just pay me" attitude.

I assume a pizza delivery driver type position??????


HMMMMMM This rust for brains would NOT have made it past the interview with the GM at my store. the GM gets to "scare them" before I get a hold of them MUHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH in training shifts

The "I don't give a fuck, just pay me" attitude will get stomped (figureatively speaking of course ) outta them REAL QUICK. Most newbie drivers are informed as to their duties BESIDES delivering and we do enforce this stuff.

Don't like it ---- There is the door. Bye Bye sorry no consolation prize for you.

[Parrothead]

New manager interviewed a driver recently.

20 years old, never worked before (I can give that one a pass)
Had to step out to call his dad to text him his Social Security number
Thought the job would be "easy" (Ha haha hahaha hahahahano)
Came in with an "I don't give a fuck, just pay me" attitude.

[WishfulSpirit]

Unless I miss my guess, (which is a jaded and cynical one) things here went pretty much the way the "applicant" wanted them to go. I've seen WAY too many people who have to go through the motions of seeking a job but are apprehensive that they might actually GET one, so they do just about every inappropriate thing on the list. In this case the clothing, (Added bonus - don't have to go home and change into bar clothes after the sure-to-be-quick interview!) and the two tag-alongs are just insurance.

That's giving them WAY too much credit. The cover models for STD Monthly actually think they look good dressed like jailbait, so that's why they show up.

[fireheart]

Don't call us after we have run your background check, physical and drug screen(that we pay for) and ask if you can have a copy of those papers for other jobs you have applied for. Also, when we tell you we are going to run state and federal background checks, that is the best time to disclose that extensive criminal background (2 misdemeanors is all we forgive)..it was all disclosed on those papers you want to use to apply for other positions

The ONLY time I would ever ask for this stuff is if the checks were being done for a temp agency and I was trying to get onto other agencies books. (As it stands, I'm currently on 2 possibly 3)

I have a new one from yesterday at my brand new job: have an arrogant attitude towards the receptionist or ask for HR at a school of all places (yes, the public system has HR, as do some church-related private schools, but for an entirely independent public school with 120 students?!).

[WishfulSpirit]

I never thought I'd have to say this, but it seems to be becoming a more common way to not get a job:

Have poor/no credit.

Yeah it sucks but there are ways around it. If YOU, as the prospective employee, bring any issues up and explain them, it makes you sound like someone who has hit some bumps in the road but knows how to take on problems. I, for example, have explained that we were hit by an uninsured driver and my husband's medical bills ruined our credit, but that we're working with a debt consolidation company and trying to get out of the hole. I've been hired because I did that.

CAVEAT: "Medical bills we couldn't pay" is the ONE good thing about living in a country without single-payer health systems. It still totally wreaks your life but at least you have a good "not our fault" reason for a poor score.

[Android Kaeli]

The worst time to ask for a job in the Warehouse's bakery is when you are ordering a cake.

First, we don't have anything to do with the hiring process. That is with the managers.

Second, we also don't have anything to do with your placement should you get hired. You want a position in the bakery? Not happening, unless one of us gets fired or quits.

Third, don't get pissed off when we tell you that the best way to ask for a job is ask a manager.

And finally, when we ask you if you want a manager to talk to you to see if there is any openings, don't go bat-shit insane and tell us to "fudge the cake, fudge you, fudge the company".

[WishfulSpirit]

I was just being truthful. >< According to him, those answers make it sound like I don't care about anything. I don't quite understand how "I will do anything you want, anytime you want" translates to "I'm lazy".

Not really, it translates more to "I am desperate and all I want out of my job is money, therefore you can expect me to jump ship the second something better opens up." I know that's not what you're saying, but that's the way it sounds to a hiring manager. Put something specific, like "I want to work with people" or "I want to work with machines."

[BrenDAnn]

A short, but sweet one from today:

1) See that C-Store is Now Hiring!
2) Fill out and return application
3) Note on application that you were fired from your last job for stealing

We want a thief on our staff because? That's right. We don't. Next candidate please!

[EricKei]

A couple of stories from Opalin on this topic

[Seshat]

I hope you are successful in your future endeavors. It would be a good idea to get rid of that tattoo.

Alternatives: dermablend (or equivalent) makeup; glove.

Dermablend is a thick foundation-like makeup which is designed for covering things like tattoos and keloid scars. Bast and I have used it for body-makeup (scar covering) for photography.
We even used Bast's dermablend once to smooth out scarring on the back of a different model with darker skin than Bast's! I had to smear it more thinly than would fully cover the scars, but it worked - in an 'impressionist painting' sort of way.

[catcul]

According to the Assistant Project Manager, you were very smart and picked up our processes very quickly. We also found out a major problem with you. You do not have a valid driver's license. Our job requires driving to remote locations. If our branches were only in major metropolitan locations, I could see how you could pull it off. Unfortunately, I've had to go to branches where the nearest hotel was 20 miles away. It would be too much of a pain for you to go to those locations.

[registerrodeo]

Don't call us after we have run your background check, physical and drug screen(that we pay for) and ask if you can have a copy of those papers for other jobs you have applied for. Also, when we tell you we are going to run state and federal background checks, that is the best time to disclose that extensive criminal background (2 misdemeanors is all we forgive)..it was all disclosed on those papers you want to use to apply for other positions

[NecessaryCatharsis]

Show up five minutes late for the interview - big no no. When I mention your tardiness, and ask if you had trouble finding the place (here's a hint, I was giving you an out, take it) don't go off on me, claim that I scheduled you for 8:38, and since you got here at 8:34 you were actually 4 minutes early. Don't keep insisting this is true after I say no, I asked you for 8:30.

The boss probably wouldn't have hired someone who was late, I might have, we need people really badly for the next couple months. There is no way I'm going to recommend hiring someone who argues with me in the interview! And people don't schedule things for 8:38 as a rule.