Things I am not allowed to do at work.

[catcul]

If I hear a scream in the maternity ward, I'm not allowed to look.

If I hear a scream in the emergency room, I'm not allowed to look.

If I hear a scream in the morgue, I'm running away and not looking back.

[mathnerd]

Not allowed to use adult oriented analogies to explain math concepts to high schoolers. Must save those for the college students.

[rapana1]

Not allowed to lie down on the display bed.
Definitely not allowed to crawl under the covers with the crossword and a cuppa.

[Skeen]

Totally allowed to spend 3 hours at lunch with the boss helping her finish Christmas shopping.

Totally NOT allowed to gloat about it to everyone else.

[fireheart]

When a customer asks for the Christmas baubles,I will not whip out my testicles,paint them,spray them with fake snow and dangle them in the customer's face,saying 'What about THESE for a pair of baubles?'

*snerk*

New one from the other day:

We ARE allowed to belt out the Spongebob Squarepants theme.

I am not allowed to change the words.

[Kit-Ginevra]

When a customer asks for the Christmas baubles,I will not whip out my testicles,paint them,spray them with fake snow and dangle them in the customer's face,saying 'What about THESE for a pair of baubles?'

[Dreamstalker]

Not allowed to get back at customers who can't stack baskets by creating a mini-fort next to SCO and forcing them to figure out how to get their own basket on there (only possible if you stack them the way they should be).

FEM applauded my efforts and said that normally she'd let it ride but as we were having visiting suits I had to make it disappear quick.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Yes Irv, a dab of eggnog spilled on one's pants looks like....cum.

That doesn't mean it's appropriate to point this out in a break room full of people trying to eat.

[Mikkel]

There is a reference here and I am missing it.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Krampus

Not very child friendly

[fireheart]

No, Irv, even if we did have a Santa Claus at the store for kids to visit, we still wouldn't allow you to roam the aisles dressed as Krampus.

There is a reference here and I am missing it.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

No, Irv, even if we did have a Santa Claus at the store for kids to visit, we still wouldn't allow you to roam the aisles dressed as Krampus.

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Well, I guess I can't take the store manager we have over my knee and use my belt on his ass that he ain't got.

Same goes for putting him in "Time Out."


Or sending him to bed without supper.

Or send home a note to his Mommy about his conduct.

[fireheart]

When the new bossman comes in, I am not allowed to:

-Ask him why he chose to downgrade himself. (He's coming from a school that is licensed for maybe 50-70 kids, to one that is licensed for 120!)
-Ask why he's working at a school so far from his house. (the school he was previously at is about a 45-minute drive from my house)
-Tell the kids that he's a pushover
-Tell the kids he's super-strict.

[Kit-Ginevra]

I am not allowed to divide the customers into those who I would zap with my death ray and those who would be taken as my personal slaves to obey my every whim in my harem...

[Dreamstalker]

For some reason I'm not allowed to ignore calls for assistance that do not actually require assistance, just basic critical thinking ability (you really need me to tell you to select the payment method or how to use the produce menu?!)