Workday Phrases of Lore and Legend

[dalesys]

"I've been touching your stuff."

[catcul]

"Never touch another man's mouse. It's personal."

[EricKei]

a - "2 felons 1 car" ? Really? o_O REALLY?

b - I figured you'd be the only other person who'd get that

[catcul]

"I grabbed Chris' dongle."
"You messed him up."

[EricKei]

Office Manager: "[He] is my male enhancement!"

[catcul]

"Put your small package in there."

[catcul]

"Someone's playing with my bag."

[Solacelawlz]

Zomg Coke just brought back Surge today!!!
Really?
Hell yea!! I feel like I just struck gold and I need to pour it in a vault and Scrooge McDuck it!!

[Dentarthurdent]

Him: Every time you come over here you ALWAYS gotta mess with it. And every time, it pinches you.
Me: and what does that tell you about me?
Him: ...I'm not even gonna go there...

[Dreamstalker]

"Attention customers. You may have noticed the lights turning off. That is because the store is CLOSED. Stop gawking at the vast cereal possibilities and come to the registers. We will be open tomorrow, I promise."

[EricKei]

"Never piss off a guy who buys his ink by the gallon"

[crazylegs]

I preferred coming in the other way

[Shangri-laschild]

"I thought I wasn't me?"

[Deserted]

I need a receipt.
What, don't you trust me?
It's not that, it's for the IRS, they don't trust ME.

[bhskittykatt]

"I was too busy fingering myself to get that paper ready."